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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/22934932">In Orbit of the Moon</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/GemsAndAshes/pseuds/GemsAndAshes'>GemsAndAshes</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Fall Out Boy, My Chemical Romance, Panic! at the Disco, Twenty One Pilots</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Harry Potter Setting, Alternate Universe - Hogwarts, M/M, Mentions of Attempted Suicide, mild description of violence</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-02-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 07:48:19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>33,512</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/22934932</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/GemsAndAshes/pseuds/GemsAndAshes</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Frank is freed from his mundane, lonely life in Jersey and welcomed into a magical world he never knew he was a part of. Gerard would love nothing more than to leave it all behind and never have to hear the word ‘Pureblood’ again.</p><p>Meanwhile, Mikey is ripping his hair out trying to keep his brother from falling apart and repair the Family Name, all while struggling to get to the bottom of what ever the hell it is Ray Toro’s hiding.</p><p>Add dark secrets, supernatural creatures, betrayals and new found relationships into the mix, and well...</p><p>It's a wonder Hogwarts hasn't fallen apart at the wands of these four yet.</p><p>(Also featuring: Your favourite ‘will they, won’t they’, Peterick, the explosive combo of Ryden, and the bromance to romance of Joshler, all along for this shit show of a ride)</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Frank Iero/Gerard Way, Josh Dun/Tyler Joseph, Patrick Stump/Pete Wentz, Ray Toro/Mikey Way, Ryan Ross/Brendon Urie</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>65</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>107</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Prologue</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <b><span class="big">Gerard</span></b>
</p><p>My mind went blank as soon as that single word was spoken. Everything felt fuzzy. The buzz of the Great Hall seemed muted, disjointed, as if it were a hundred miles off rather than mere feet in front of me. I felt myself slipping away, the forefront of my mind going hazy, almost as though I had come to exist outside myself: a spectator on the unfortunate life of Gerard Way. God, I wished I was... because this was fucked.</p><p>I’d gone my whole life believing there was only one option. You know when something is so set in stone you forget there were even other possibilities in the first place? Only to have reality slap you across the face and send you careening into the unknown? That’s exactly what happened the second the Sorting Hat spoke. I’d been raised constantly hearing:</p><p>
  <i>"Oh Gerard, you’re a natural Slytherin"</i>
</p><p>
  <i>"Every great Wizard in the Family was one, no doubt about it young man, you’re definitely a Slytherin!"</i>
</p><p><i>"Oh you’re going to do us all so</i> proud <i>in, Slytherin".</i></p><p>Because Ways ended up in Slytherin.</p><p>Not fucking Ravenclaw.</p><p>To say I was shocked was an understatement.</p><p><i>There must be something wrong here, maybe it’s a joke courtesy of the other Slytherins, some sort of bullshit hazing ritual… Yes, Father always went on about those,</i> I thought. But, as I looked over to that table, packed with the faces I had grown up surrounded by (for better or worse), I saw nothing but a mixture of shock and revulsion. Anyone who met my eyes, looked away.</p><p>
  <i>Worse. Definitely for worse...<i></i></i>
</p><p>
    <i>Wow. They were taking it too far.</i>
</p><p>
    <i>No. No, maybe I just heard him wrong. I’m probably so stressed that I’m imagining things. Fuck, it wouldn’t be the first time. I mean, I’ve got enough anxiety to fuel a muggle senior class for a decade. That would explain why I’m shaking so much. Fuck. I’m going to pass out,</i> I thought.
</p><p>
    Stress. My constant emotional companion was grabbing me by the throat.
</p><p>
    When no one burst into laughter and the seconds dragged on, I felt a hole beginning to open up in the pit of my stomach. My hands flew to the brim of the Sorting Hat, trembling.
</p><p>
    <i>No. There’s no fucking way. Too much has gone wrong already, and now this? THIS IS MY BIRTH RIGHT!</i> I screamed in my head.
</p><p>
  
    I felt my grip tighten further on the hat. That shitty, old, glorified rag probably fucked up, because there was no way I wasn't in Slytherin, I’m a <i>Way</i> for fuck's sake.
 
</p><p>
    So, I said all I could think to say in that moment:
</p><p>
    “What the fuck?!”
</p><p>
    The hall immediately erupted into shocked gasps, the muttering grew ever louder, and I could feel my skin crawl. My eyes darted around the room only to see a hundred more staring right back at me, each pair quickly darting away when they met mine. Everyone was whispering to their neighbour, the crowds of first years at their respective tables were shifting and murmuring amongst themselves. It was all growing to a swell, a colossal wave of deafening judgement, and it was about to swallow me up and crush me in its depths.
</p><p>
    I jumped up off the stool as the hat shifted on my head.
</p><p>
    “You heard me boy, you’re of Ravenclaw house.”
</p><p>
    “No,” I replied simply.
</p><p>
    Another bout of vicious whispers rippled throughout the room.
</p><p>
     <i>"Gerard Way? A Ravenclaw?"</i>
</p><p>
      <i>"And he has the gaul to talk back to the Sorting Hat?"</i>
</p><p>
      <i>"How have they been raising that boy?"</i>
</p><p>
    <i>"Are you sure he’s even really a</i>Way<i>?"</i>
</p><p>
    God, I could practically hear them all now. My chest felt like it was constricting, as if someone had tied rope around my ribs and every murmur from the hall only served to pull them tighter..
</p><p>
    Headmistress McGonagall was rounding on me, with an expression I couldn't quite read on her face. It was sorrowful, almost… pity?
</p><p>
    She reached out to grip the Hat but I dodged underneath her outstretched hand, ducking away my hands clammy, but firm on the brim.
</p><p>
      Now or never, I have to fix this.
</p><p>
    “Stop playing games and put me in Slytherin, you know that’s where I’m meant to be!” I hissed at the hat, eyeing McGonagall’s approach.
</p><p>
    The hall had erupted into discord at this point, some people shouting out at me to "Sit down you little prick!" But I didn’t care. They could get fucked, I was fixing this. I <i>had</i> to. Before <i>They</i> could find out. The mere thought sent a shiver up my spine.
</p><p>
    “You didn’t even ask nicely; didn’t your parents ever teach you that manners open doors?” The mouldy piece of carpet replied snidely.
</p><p>
    I sighed shallowly; I couldn’t believe I was having to beg with this glorified Buzzfeed quiz right now.
</p><p>
    I let out an exasperated sigh and dodged McGonagall’s grasp again, ignoring her shout of "Young man, you come back here right now, or I swear to Merlin-" and bolting to the other side of the hall.
</p><p>
    The volume of the room had increased dramatically. I was starting to sweat.
</p><p>
    I momentarily caught the gaze of a curly haired boy amongst the other first years at the Hufflepuff table. Strangely, his expression wasn’t ouraged or shocked like the others'. It was... sad? Concerned? Like the kid was really empathising with me. Like he... cared? I blinked, and the moment was gone, the fear returning in full force.
</p><p>
    I could see Professor Malfoy rising from my end of the table, cold and steely, I had to fight to internalise a shriek. “Fine, can you please put me in the right house?” I beg, in a hurry, the anxiety creeping into my voice as clear as day.
</p><p>
    “You can do better than that,” the Hat taunted.
</p><p>
      <i>I’m going to set this manky dish rag alight.</i>
</p><p>
    “Can you please, <i>please</i> put me in the right house!” I spit through gritted teeth. Malfoy was advancing on me, now, wand in hand <i> What, is he going to stun me or something?</i>, McGonagall was somewhere to my rear. Between them and the looming faces of my peers, I’m surrounded on all sides, my heart was in my throat.
</p><p>
    “I already did,” the Hat replied simply, and the motherfucker had the audacity to laugh.
</p><p>
    I felt a firm set of hands clamp down on my shoulders. “Now that really is quite enough, Mr. Way!” I heard McGonagall snap at me, her expression severe. I felt the pressure tighten in my chest, unfurling upwards and choking up my throat. I looked desperately around for some sort of help, but all the other pureblood kids, my so-called 'friends', were still eyeing their fingernails with a keen interest.
</p><p>
      <i>Just brilliant.</i>
</p><p>
    With every chest rattling pound of my heart, I felt reality slipping further away. Life had turned into a horror movie, a comic frame in nauseating technicolor that made me dizzy. I could already feel the tears trickling down my face. The sea of my peers felt larger, somehow, with their judgmental faces looming over me in a social tidal wave of ridicule. The figures of the crowd became increasingly distorted, faces leering out at me unnaturally as everything fuzzed around the edges. Haunting laughter echoed around the hall and grated at my ears. The invisible vines that had slithered up around my throat and chest tightened harder and I felt a shudder wrack my frame.
</p><p>
      <i>Oh fuck I can’t breathe. I-I need to get out of here, I NEED TO GET OUT OF HERE!</i>
</p><p>
    In a fit of desperation, I shoved McGonagall’s hands off. I tossed the ragged Hat at her feet, and beelined for the main doors. Once again, I caught the eye of that curly haired kid; he actually made a move to follow me.
</p><p>
      <i>He probably pities me too, who the fuck does he think he is?</i>
</p><p>
    So, I politely told him to "F-fuck off,".
</p><p>
    The silence that  fell across the Great Hall was deafening and I find it’s so much worse than the laughter. It’s clinging to me, smothering me, <i>drowning me</i>. And while they glared, no one reached out to stop me as I ran.
</p><p>
    My lungs felt as though they were collapsing once I reached the grand doorway out onto the grounds.
</p><p>
      <i>I. need. to. breathe.</i>
</p><p>
    I slammed them open and sprinted out into the night, the cold, biting, Scottish air nipping at me as it whipped by. 
</p><p>
    I was suddenly sent flying as I tripped over my own desperate feet, landing, hard, onto all fours. The sting of my hands was enough to send my emotional dam crumbling down right then and there. 
</p><p>
    With no more strength to hold it in, I just dissolved into sobs: the kind that retch through your entire body, bruising you on the inside, and leaving you sore for days.
</p><p>
    My blood was still pumping in what I could only describe as terror. An all encompassing, cold sweat inducing terror.
</p><p>
    I didn’t want to go back in there, <i>ever</i>. I didn’t ever want to go back home. I couldn’t face <i>Them</i> now. Everything had been ripped out from under me and I was in a free fall, waiting for the crash.
</p><p>
    <i>I-I don’t want to live anymore</i>, I realised as I choked painfully on a sob.
</p><p>
      <i>Perhaps... </i>
</p><p>
        But before I could ponder that thought any longer, there were hands grasping my shoulders and ushering me, numb and unseeing, back into the Great Hall.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p><b>Gems</b>: Shit, nothing better to kick things off with then a panic induced meltdown amirite?</p><p><b>Ashes</b>: Hello children welcome to our gay emo magical clusterfuck</p><p><b>Gems</b>: So when can the rats expect new chapters?</p><p><b>Ashes</b>: Gems and I will be posting every other week (or fortnightly, as Gems says *side eye*) </p><p><b>Gems</b>: BOI PEOPLE SAY FORTNIGHT ALL THE TIME</p><p><b>Ashes</b>: WELL I DON’T, anyway- we are co writing this and posting on a <b>fortnightly</b> schedule however, if there are any delays please forgive us, college and work are bitches :)</p><p><b>Gems</b>: Leave a kudo and a comment, and feel free to ask questions ^-^</p><p><b>Ashes</b>: And feel free to follow Gems on IG where there's screaming about mcr regularly! @so_long_and_carry_on</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. I Just Wanted to be a Vampire But Instead I Got This</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <b>
    <span class="big">Frank</span>
  </b>
</p><p> </p><p>Okay, full disclosure: it was not in my nature to get nervous. I just didn't. It's not that I was overconfident, it wasn’t even that I didn’t worry about things, I was simply smart enough to understand that boarding a train garnered no reason for nerves. </p><p>So, why the fuck were my palms sweating so much?</p><p>I splayed them tight against my black skinny jeans, drying them quickly on the denim. The brick wall between platforms 9 and 10 was looming over me like the gate to Heaven. Or Hell. I wasn't quite sure which, yet. </p><p>"Well, are you ready darling?" My mom was hovering next to me, wringing her hands in that nervous mother way, and constantly blinking meaning tears were imminent. I lurched toward her for a tight hug before I could see them spill.</p><p>"I'm ready. Totally. Promise," I said, pulling back enough to see tear tracks on her cheeks. Damn. "I love you, Mama." More tears spilled.</p><p>"Oh, Frankie, I love you so very much," she said, clutching me tighter for one last hug. I gave a watery laugh and patted her shoulder.</p><p>"I'll write, okay? I have Bowie, so I'll make sure to write. Okay, Mama?" The little black screech owl turned his golden eyes on me at the mention of his name. It almost looked like he gave a little nod. </p><p>"Yes, yes, I expect letters every week. And you make sure you eat and sleep enough and study hard and… and-"</p><p>"And I'll see you at Christmas."</p><p>"Yes. Christmas." She pressed a lingering kiss to my forehead. I sighed but I couldn't blame her for stalling. We had never been separated like this before. </p><p>"Okay. Enough wasting time. Go on, now," she said firmly, wiping the remaining tears from her face, and giving me a pat on the back. I gave a curt nod and spun on my heel to take hold of my trolley.</p><p>"No turning back now," I muttered.</p><p>
  <i>Deep breath.</i>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <i>Step.</i>
</p><p>
  <i>Step. Step. Stepstepstep-</i>
</p><p>
  <i>Rush of air and-</i>
</p><p>A train whistle.</p><p>I opened my eyes to the sight of the Hogwarts Express in all its glory. </p><p>Now, there really was no turning back.</p><p>It felt like regular school all over again: all cleaned up students with uniforms of nice black robes and shoulder bags of books, chatting amicably as they headed for the train. Boarding was a blur. I kept my head down as I ducked through throngs of reuniting friends and equally terrified newcomers. Sticking out wasn't entirely my goal, though my overall appearance didn't do me any favors. In the eyes of these well-to-do British wizards, I must have looked like a delinquent: raven hair, shaved on the sides, multiple piercings in my ears, and an untucked button down over my ripped jeans. I could feel a few side glances as I booked it to the back of the train before sinking down in a blessedly empty compartment.</p><p>With headphones in, I was more than prepared to spend the entirety of the ride lost in a good playlist with maybe a nap along the way. But then I glanced to the left.</p><p>There was something entirely too cliché about the way the light was filtering through the window, creating a halo around his head. But it made perfect sense. The boy in the compartment across from me was practically angelic. Any other person would disagree, I was sure. He had hair the kind of black that only comes from dye (or maybe a spell because it did look impressively even and shiny), skin paler than any vampire, and wide hazel eyes which were trained intensely on a weathered sketchbook in his lap. His hand was working leisurely at something I couldn't see and he had the barest hint of a smile on his lips.</p><p>His hand was working leisurely at something I couldn't see and he had the barest hint of a smile on his lips. </p><p>I took a moment to long to tear my eyes away because I soon noticed the piercing glare of the other boy in the compartment. If looks could kill, I should have been dead ten times over from the daggers shooting out of the blonde boys eyes. There was a clear family resemblance between the two, but this boy's features were sharp, his hair dirty blonde, and his eyes hard and calculating. Regardless of any similarities, he was a stark contrast to the black haired angel. </p><p>I tore my eyes away, quickly, and hit shuffle on my iPod while the train shrieked and pulled out. Briefly, I wished my mother could've been among the parents on the platform, if only to wave goodbye one last time.</p><p>~°~</p><p>Somewhere in between David Bowie's Greatest Hits and American Idiot, I must have fallen asleep because I knew I had been listening to Ziggy Stardust. Now, I was keenly aware of Billie Joe Armstrong shouting in my ear as a sweet looking old woman tapped on the glass door of my compartment. I plucked the buds out of my ears and gave a nod prompting her to open up the door.</p><p>"Anything from the trolley, dear?" She asked in a crisp British accent. I let my lips quirk into a slight smile and stood up to survey the trolley full of unfamiliar treats. The array was so mind boggling, I didn't notice the door across from me sliding open. </p><p>"Excuse me, ma'am," came a soft voice. And, hang on. That was an accent I would recognize anywhere.</p><p>
  <i>Jersey. </i>
</p><p>My eyes shot up to see the face of the dark haired boy as he reached determinedly for something black and shaped like a wand. He dropped a few coins into the woman's hand and, just as he was sliding his compartment door shut again, his eyes caught mine. It was a split second, it was weird, and it made strange flutters go off in my stomach. Flutters, that I refused to call butterflies because, fuck no, I was not in a fucking Disney movie.</p><p>I reached for the same thing he had grabbed and dug into my pockets for the pouch of coins my mother had given me.</p><p>"How much, ma'am?" The lady smiled and asked for two sickles (the silver ones, I remembered mom telling me). I paid my way and retreated back to solitude in order to examine what I had just blindly bought. I swear, Little Bowie was judging me from his cage next to me.</p><p>It was wrapped in plastic which stuck as I peeled it off. The smell was familiar though and I sighed in relief. </p><p><i>Liquorice</i>, I thought and I took a bite. It was good, and I worked my way through half of it before wrapping the rest and shoving it into my rucksack with my robes.</p><p><i>I should probably put those on, join the crowd of respectable children</i>, I thought before digging out the carefully folded heap of black.</p><p>I stalked down the train aisle, in search of a bathroom to change in, and walked right into another body.</p><p><i>Oh, great going, Iero</i>, I thought bitterly. Looking up, I saw it was the blond from the other compartment. He was glaring at me with narrowed eyes and all I could do was mutter a quick “excuse me” and shuffle past him into the bathroom. </p><p>Dressed in my robes, I thought I looked like some kind of preppy grim reaper. All I needed was a scythe. I dug into the fold of fabric and pulled out my newly purchased wand. </p><p>Teak wood, so dark it was nearly black, and a phoenix feather core. </p><p>Brandishing the wand, I looked at myself in the bathroom mirror. I looked like a real life D&amp;D character.</p><p><i>Awesome</i>.</p><p>The train whistle blew, yet again, announcing our arrival. As I settled back into my compartment, I watched the station approach and tried to keep my breathing calm.</p><p>"It's just school. What could possibly go wrong?"</p><p>Bowie squawked at me and I rolled my eyes.</p><p>"Oh, shut up."</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p><b>Ashes</b>: HELLO RATS I HOPE YOU ENJOYED THIS BEAUTIFUL NEW TRAIN WRECK OF A CHAPTER if you didn’t I am so sorry….</p><p><b>Gems</b>: Of course they loved it you talented rat, anyway sorry this chapter was a couple days late (We're trying to get the first few out weekly before sticking to the fortnight schedule), we’re really great at this. </p><p><b>Ashes</b>: I’m ADD as fuck but I’m really trying here, DON’T COME AT ME PLEASE but yes! We will definitely try to get these chapters up as quick as we can! </p><p><b>Gems</b>: We might publish the next one early to make up for it, who knows. So thanks again for reading this trainwreck and thanks for all the support so far ^-^. I really love reading the comments &lt;3</p><p><b>Ashes</b>: ME TOO thank you for the comments and kudos! Don't forget to follow Gems on IG @so_long_and_carry_on and we’ll see you next chapter BYE NOW</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck (When You Really do)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <b>
    <span class="big">Gerard</span>
  </b>
</p><p>
  <i> “Just take my hand Gerard, I’m right here…”</i>
</p><p>The whistle of nearby trains cut straight through the vapours of that distant memory. As I was forced to open my eyes, I couldn't help but groan. </p><p>
  <i>Why in God's name was I remembering that right here, right now? </i>
</p><p>I looked ahead at that accursed grimy brick wall between platforms 9 and 10. </p><p>
  <i>Oh yeah, that’s why. </i>
</p><p>Mikey was tapping his foot impatiently beside me, arms crossed. The muggle portion of Kings Cross was absolutely buzzing around us, tight suited businessmen and women darted around like ants on seemingly invisible paths, it was quite an interesting sceptical to observe. Mikey fixed me with a hard glare.</p><p>
  <i>So I guess we’re back to tenfold dickheadery already? Oh joy. </i>
</p><p>“We’re going to be late Gee. All the good carriages are probably filled already," Mikey said, his tone starting to edge on exasperated. </p><p>I snort. “We’ve got a half hour 'til the train leaves, <i>Princess</i>, don’t get your panties in a knot,"</p><p>He gives me one of his patented Mikey Way<sup>TM</sup> Glares. “I’m aware of that Gerard, but that doesn’t change the fact that I’m right," A small part of me took joy in irritating him. Maybe it was an older brother thing. A man in a pinstripe vest suddenly came barrelling past us, slamming into Mikey’s shoulder before hurrying away without apology. Mikey’s features immediately slid back into a snarl of disgust.</p><p>“Fucking muggles.” He hissed</p><p>Rolling my eyes, I turned my attention back to the unassuming wall. I took a deep breath and unenthusiastically proceeded forward, mentally hoping that the trolley would just slam against the wall and force me to miss the train. </p><p>Alas, I had no such luck.</p><p>The whole platform was lit by beams of dusty sunrays. The wizarding world side of the Station was similarly teeming with bustling crowds. Though the business savvy suits were instead replaced with colourful velvet robes and pointed hats. I always found it fascinating stepping into the muggle world, if not for a moment. It was like entering a new dimension entirely.</p><p>Mikey was beside me in a moment, wasting no time in making a beeline for the train. I couldn’t complain, really. The sooner we were tucked away from everyone inside a quiet carriage, the better. Surprisingly, I had yet to attract the usual unwanted attention I garnered. </p><p><i>Thank Merlin</i>, I think as I reach the train doors.</p><p>“Is that him?” I hear a hushed whisper.</p><p>
  <i>Shit. Of course I had to jinx it. </i>
</p><p>“Wait, the freak? Or the hot one?” There was a group of first years grouped next to a nearby news rack, unabashedly staring right at me. At least they had the balls not to hide it. Or the stupidity.</p><p>“Yeah him.” A stout freckled boy pointed straight at me. </p><p>
  <i>Fuck me, have I not missed this. </i>
</p><p>Muttering broke out amongst the small group.</p><p>“I heard he’s in with the dark arts,” a bespeckled girl burst out. </p><p>"Shh! Don't let him hear you!"</p><p>“Yeah, my older brother heard he’s actually a vampire.” </p><p><i>I’m going to throttle whoever started that rumour</i>, I think darkly.</p><p>The hairs stood up on the back of my neck, I could feel them staring. Fuck this. I whipped around to face them dead on, causing one of them to actually squeak. </p><p>“Yeah, and if you don’t watch out I’ll rip out your jugular!” I bite back, swinging around before I could even see their reactions and storming onto the train. That would give the rumour mill something to fucking talk about. I crammed myself into the already overcrowded entry carriage, the general consensus, judging by the other students expressions, was that I was completely fucking insane.</p><p>Mikey stormed on right behind me, frantically flailing his arms in the air in an unspoken <i>What the actual fuck?! </i></p><p>“What the hell was that? Do you know how bad that looks on you? On <i>me</i>?” He spluttered, motioning wildly to his person with his hands. I smirked. Everything always had to come back to him, didn’t it? “Christ Gerard," he huffed and pushed onwards to the back carriages. </p><p>“You know, you could just go sit with your friends, Mikes,” I said as we reached a stand-still behind a group of nattering third years. “It must be kind of embarrassing to have to come sit with your big freak of a brother.” The tallest of the three turned to face me with a flutter of the lashes before stopping in her tracks once she saw who I was. She was quick to whip her hair back into my face in apparent disinterest. I spat out her greasy hair in disgust. Luckily, I didn’t swing that way I guess…</p><p>Mikey sighed and pushed his slipping glasses up the bridge of his nose. He flashed the girls his most ‘charming’ smile, and they of course broke out into annoyingly fake flirty giggles, falling back against the wall to let us pass. I had to fight down the urge to upchuck my breakfast.</p><p>“You’re totally abusing your powers Mikes,” I muttered as we slid past them.</p><p>“It’s called utilizing my assets Gee,” He responded after he’d finished waving to the girls. “Besides, it’d be more embarrassing for me to have my brother sitting all alone. I have to at least try and make you seem functional.” I don’t think Mikey realised just how much of a bitch he was being. Or hell, maybe he did and just didn’t care. Probably the latter.</p><p>We came to, yet another, standstill in another entryway, both fresh faces and old trying to weasel past the line. This monotony was killing me. I bounced on my feet, uncomfortably. All these people in this claustrophobic sardine can were making my skin crawl. I clutched my sketchbook tight, I longed to be hidden away in a carriage with just me and my questionable artistic ability.</p><p>I was pulled out of the fantasy by someone coming through the open door slamming up against me and pushing me back into a burley sixth year who fixed me with a death glare. I offered him an apologetic smile as I felt the asshole who’d just barged into me immediately tense up beside me.</p><p>“What the fuck du-” I turned around to tear the guy a new one but was instead met with a face I would rather not have.</p><p>“Oh. Um, hi Ray…” Any fleeting sense of confidence I had previously was vaporised as I folded my arms nervously around myself.</p><p>He looked… different. He had shot up over the summer and was lurching over me by a head easily. His curls were unruly as ever, but the warmth had well and truly left his eyes. Instead there was something new there that I couldn’t quite place.</p><p>His bushy eyebrows were shot up in terror, like he’d just seen a ghost. I suppose in a way he had. Swiftly, he snatched his arm away from where it touched mine, as though he had been burned by the very contact alone.</p><p>He retreated back so fast that he clumsily slammed into the wall behind him, squashing a terrified first year behind him. He <i>actually</i> let out an ‘eep’ before he jumped forward again, eyes darting a mile a minute around the carriage like a caged animal.</p><p>Wow. What the fuck was his problem? Was he that freaked out at seeing me? Hell, <i>I</i> should be the one who’s scared of <i>him</i>. </p><p>“I-I’ve got to go,” he muttered, so soft and fast I barely caught it over the humdrum of the station. Quick as a billywig, he booked it straight off the train and back out onto the platform, out of sight.</p><p>“Wait-” I start, but I’m stopped by a firm hand on my shoulder and I turn to see Mikey shooting daggers right on after him. </p><p>“I don’t trust that Toro kid,” he seethed, words dripping with malice. Mikey had never been the biggest fan of Ray, truth be told, but since the events of last year he had grown a particular distaste for the boy.</p><p>As he caught my eye I saw a flicker of sympathy as he took in the state Ray had left me in. For a moment, his features softened, and he pulled his hand away. The spectators I was unaware we had garnered begun to turn back to their idle conversation,</p><p>“And besides,” he flicked his hand, as if he were casting off some invisible muck, “it would be best for you to not fraternise with half-breed scum like him.” I swallowed uncomfortably. I hated it when Mikey talked like that. Like he actually believed it.</p><p><i>Mother would be so</i> proud <i>of him</i>, I thought with a shudder</p><p>“I-I don’t know about that, Mikes…” I managed, trying to brush off his spiteful words.</p><p>He snorted and I shivered. He looked so much like our Father in that moment it was scary. “Why let a mudblood like that bother you?” My eyes went wide, I turned around to see if anyone had reacted to the slur but they all seemed largely nonplussed.</p><p>“You know you can’t say that anymore...” I shuffled my feet, this whole conversation was making me beyond uncomfortable as we slowly worked our way up the train aisle, trapped between groups of students. <i>No escape</i>.</p><p>“Ha- Oh Gerard, I can and I will. I mean, let’s face it, he <i>is filth</i>. Especially compared to you,” he gestured towards me, “compared to us.” His voice hyped up in excitement, the space between his eyebrows crinkling the way they did when he was on a role. “We’re Ways for fuck's sake! So I don’t want you wasting your time worrying over someone as insignificant and pathetic as ‘<i>Ray Toro</i>’.” He concluded leaning back triumphantly against the wood panelled wall.</p><p>I was taken aback. Merlin, he sounded so vicious. I knew he was just protecting me. But a part of me felt like he was taking way too much pleasure in being so brutal. That he took this blood purity <i>bullshit</i>, drilled into us by our parents, entirely too far.</p><p>“I-” I think for a moment about what to say and, with a sigh, decide on a muttered “thanks...”, my gaze cast down to where I kicked numbly at the ratty blue carpet. I couldn’t remember when I lost the ability to call him out on his bullshit. It was kind of pathetic, really. I couldn’t even take a stand against my own little brother.</p><p>Thankfully, I was right and there were, indeed, still free carriages near the back of the train. With a grateful sigh, I sunk into one of the well-worn seats, feeling the tension leave my body all at once. After retrieving my sketchbook and hurling my bag onto the rack above, I let myself drift off, losing myself in my drawing.</p><p>Mikey took up the seats across from me, grunting with annoyance as he tried to weed his awkwardly long gangly legs through the arm rests as so he could lay down. I snorted; the look he flung my way was undercut by the fact his leg was currently in the air ballerina style. Within a few moments he was immersed in one of his new textbooks, and I could finally relax.</p><p>~°~</p><p>I was acutely aware of my stomach growling as we barrelled through the countryside, ancient farmhouses and vibrant green pastures turned dull under the grey UK sun passed in a blur outside the grimy train window.<br/>
Turning back to my notebook licking my lips, instantly I sucked in air through my teeth in pain as I realised they were raw. I had this bad habit of gnawing at them when I was ‘in the zone’. I couldn’t help but feel a little proud, though, as I gazed at the fierce looking chimera on the page before me. </p><p>If there was anything I actually liked about this whole magic business, it was the surplus of fantastic creatures; every one of them was something straight out of the pages of muggle fantasy novels and comics. They were all so striking, so beautiful, just-<i>unique</i>: perfect muses for my quill. And as I finish off adding another spine to its scorpion tail I see Mikey shift from over the top of my journal. </p><p>He was already asleep, as per usual, likely having crashed soon after coming out of London. His brows furrowed in his sleep, his thick textbook from before sprawled open, forgotten, on his lap, threatening to fall off at any moment. </p><p>I took a moment to study him candidly, something I hadn’t been able to do for a long while. Contrary to his cocky persona, Mikey hated it when people stared. But of course, no one at Hogwarts knew that.</p><p>His cheekbones were already annoyingly prominent, despite his age, and his limbs were all impossibly skinny. I bit back a sigh. He looked way too grown up for a thirteen year-old. Asleep, though, he was so different, the hard lines of his face were relaxed instead of set in their usual 'fuck-off' sneer or charming smirk. I missed seeing him like that.</p><p>He snorted and twitched slightly, prompting me to pull me eyes away from him as he drifted back to consciousness. </p><p>"What're you lookin' at?" He muttered, sleep and a long forgotten Jersey drawl both thick in his voice.</p><p>"Nothin'," I said as I sat up and instantly noticed the trolley witch who had meandered her way down to our compartment.</p><p>“You want anything?” I offered, choosing to change the subject.</p><p>He shook his head, looking at me for a moment before sighing before ruffling through his bag for a coin purse, the golden rays of sunset casting the shadows on his face. </p><p>Our parents didn’t like investing in a 'lost cause', so Mikey had, consequently, become my personal bank until I could find an alternative. It was nice to know he cared about me enough to lend me a bit of his (albeit, massive) allowance, but I suspected it was more likely that he enjoyed holding it over my head. </p><p>He thumbed over a few Sickles and I flashed him a grin before quickly sliding open the door before the trolley could move on.</p><p>"Excuse me, ma'am," I offer her a grin, which she returns warmly. She really was one of the good ones, the definition of the sweet old lady trope.</p><p>It took me a moment to notice the boy hovering over the cart, his expression betraying his intimidation by the cart's contents. <i>Muggleborn probaby</i>. I shuddered at the thought of any interaction. Fortunately, I already knew what I wanted, I got it every year. As soon as I had a hold on the Liquorice Wand I dropped the Sickles into her hand. As I made to slide the door shut again, so I could get back to inking out the chimera’s mane, I glanced up and took a proper look at the boy still eyeing over the sweets.</p><p>He looked like he was straight out of a muggle grunge band, piercings and all. His whole look in this scene painted the picture of some alien boy from an entirely different world. It was kind of awesome, the whole juxtaposition of it all. His eyes were an autumn shade of brown and, I noticed with a frown, his features were flawless - from an artistic perspective. I was considering the possibility of drawing him when I noticed he was staring right back at me. </p><p><i>Merlin I wonder if he knows who I am? Just like every other dickhead in this place, I thought</i>. </p><p>I broke the contact as quick as possible, slamming the rickety door shut and slumping back into my seat. Mikey had fallen back fast asleep across from me and I was thankful. </p><p>Pulling out my sketchbook again, I ripped off the sweets packaging with my teeth and took a chunk off. I stared down at my chimera and frowned as I couldn't help but think of that strange boy. I tried my best to shake it off as best I could and get back into the flow of drawing. </p><p>It was useless, though. As soon as my chimera's mane was complete, my brain reverted back to the boy's face. Subconsciously, I flipped to a clean page and began to sketch. </p><p>Rounded cheeks… dark brows… that odd curl of hair that had flopped over his left eye… </p><p>But something still wasn't quite right. I needed to see his face again, only for a second, to make sure. I wasn’t sure what drew me to him, but whatever it was kind of unnerved me.</p><p><i>Fuck it, I'll just draw another creature. Something ugly and scary and slimy and completely not human looking with pretty brown eyes and piercings. Nope</i>.</p><p>As I threw myself into sketching a blast ended skrewt, I noticed the train getting closer to its destination. A flood of nerves went pouring through my body as I contemplated the year ahead. </p><p>Anything could happen. That fact terrified me.</p><p>But maybe, just maybe, this year would be better.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p><b>Gems</b>: Here it is, better late than never haha<br/><b>Ashes</b>: hahaha upload schedule don't know them…<br/><b>Gems</b>: So anyway here's some gay wizard angst to get you through the quarantine, hopefully we’ll have some more out within the next week?<br/><b>Ashes</b>: well since I'm holed away in my room with nothing to do but write- oh wait that's already my life...<br/><b>Gems</b>: Meanwhile I’m stuck working every night rip, ya lucky bish<br/><b>Ashes</b>: its ok covid-19 is gonna kill me<br/><b>Gems</b>: Pls no, anyway thanks for all the support, we really love it ^-^<br/><b>Ashes</b>: leave a comment, give us a kudo, and KEEP SCREAMING BLACK PARADE WHILE YOU WASH YOUR HANDS STAY HEALTHY YA RATS<br/><b>Gems</b>: Keep safe everyone ^-^</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. How to Hate the Universe and Look Fabulous Doing it</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <b>Mikey</b>
</p><p>He was having another flashback. It was written all over his face: his eyes were wide, his mouth was pressed into a thin line, and he wasn't breathing because his face was starting to turn purple. I hated it. I hated the way his memories took such control of him and prevented him from doing something as simple as board a train. </p><p>If I could have my way, I'd erase all of them. </p><p>Of course, if I could really have my way, my brother would be in the same house as me, like he was meant to. </p><p>God, how had things gone so wrong? </p><p><i>No time to think about that. You have to get Gerard on the train</i>, I reminded myself. </p><p>A train whistle blew nearby and I could feel my heart rate increase at the notion of missing our train. The train located on the other side of the magical barrier which my brother was staring at like it was a dementor. Even after three years, he couldn't make it to platform 9 and three quarters without a least one panic attack. </p><p>Merlin, now I'm panicking. <i>Ok, pull it together</i>, I thought. I schooled my features into a hard glare and felt my foot start to tap in irritation. <i>There</i>, I thought, <i>that's better</i>.</p><p>"We're going to be late, Gee. All the good carriages are probably filled already." He snorted at my shift in character and I couldn't blame him. </p><p>In my defense, it was mother and father's fault. But that excuse only worked for so much. </p><p>Fortunately, I managed to get us onto the train without much hassle, barring Gerard's outburst regarding vampiric abilities and ripping arteries. A few charming smiles thrown around in the right places, a few deadly glares here and there, and we were working our way toward the back of the Hogwarts Express. I tried to keep us moving as best I could. Everytime we stopped, I could feel Gerard freeze up beside me. </p><p>And then the worst happened: Ray Toro, in all his grace, went smashing into my brother. </p><p>
  <i>Just. Fuckin'. Perfect.</i>
</p><p>It was a short interaction that felt like it took years. My gut clenched as I watched Gerard reaching, pointlessly, after the Hufflepuff boy, who was bolting off the train faster than a Firebolt. I wrote it off as disgust and nothing more. </p><p>He looked well. Better than the last time I had seen him. </p><p>
  <i> All that blood...</i>
</p><p>Fuck. No. This wasn't the time to think about that. Not when he had been a complete ass to my own brother. Not when he was clearly hiding something. </p><p>Not when he was nothing but mudblood filth.</p><p>"I don't trust that Toro Kid," I spoke, taking in Gerard's shaken state. For a moment, the anger dissipated. My brother deserved better. A better friend. </p><p>I let the anger rise again, with a healthy dose of overconfidence just to keep up my own morale. I needed to believe myself if I was to convince Gerard.</p><p>“And besides,” I gave a flippant wave of my hand, "it would be best for you to not associate with half-breed scum like him.” </p><p>
  <i>I sound like them. God, Gerard must hate me.</i>
</p><p>“I-I don’t know about that, Mikes…” he said.</p><p>
  <i>Yes, you do, when will you learn that agreeing with me makes things simpler? </i>
</p><p>I snorted in disdain for my hopeless situation, knowing that Gerard would see it instead as a perfect mimicry of Father. </p><p>"Why let a mudblood like that bother you?" There. That would seal the deal. Gerard knew there was no stopping me. I had played the proud pureblood Way part for so long, he seldom fought me anymore when I tossed about my purist notions. </p><p>It was a good thing. The less he tried to change me, the less mother and father would worry, the less he would be punished, and the less they cared about anything he did. </p><p>It was a good thing. That, I truly believed. </p><p>True to Gerard's earlier assumptions, we found an empty carriage in the back and settled in quickly. My latest text book on magical creatures was thick enough to keep me busy for the entirety of the journey, while Gerard engrossed himself in his worn leather sketchbook. I smiled, slightly, as I noticed he was beginning to run out of pages. </p><p><i>I should get him a new one</i>, I thought. </p><p>Mother and father would ground me for encouraging him. I would have to hide it. </p><p>After ten more minutes of waiting, I finally heard the last call to board the train. It was then that I saw him: a boy of my age, likely a first year, with raven black hair and piercing brown eyes. He looked every inch a punk in his untucked shirt and torn jeans. Clearly, he was muggleborn. No respectable pureblood would let their child dress in such a way. </p><p>He was staring at my brother.</p><p><i>Oh. No. No no no… don't even think about it, you punk</i>, I thought as I gave my best Avert-Your Eyes-Or-I'll-Gouge-Them-Out stare. </p><p>He did. </p><p>With a smug grin, I returned to my book. </p><p>No mudblood would ruin my second year. Not a chance.</p><p> </p><p>~°~</p><p>
  <i>He was hopeless, utterly hopeless. How a third year had managed to botch a potion as basic as a Confusing Concoction was beyond me. I was a first year and I had already figured that one out. Hence, my placement in advanced potions. Mother and father saw it fit that I have a thorough knowledge of potions and charms before even setting foot on Hogwarts' grounds. </i>
</p><p>‘As a pureblood of such an esteemed lineage should’, <i>they would say. I wondered if Gerard had once received such tutoring. </i></p><p>
  <i>Even Gerard could brew a potion better than this fool. I glanced at the cauldron next to me and noticed the utterly putrid color. </i>
</p><p>
  <i>"Not exactly what we're aiming for, now is that?" I snarked and the boy looked up at me in confusion. How ironic.</i>
</p><p>
  <i>"Did you drink a Confusing Concoction before attempting to brew one?" His lips came to a pout and his brow furrowed, making him look like some kind of kicked puppy. I huffed in annoyance. </i>
</p><p>
  <i>"Are you lost or something?" I asked. He still remained silent, turning his eyes back to the rancid mess in his cauldron. His cheeks were turning pink. </i>
</p><p>
  <i>After a long moment of silence, I rolled my eyes and continued stirring. Just as my potion was finished, Professor Slughorn passed by us to inspect. </i>
</p><p>
  <i>"Ah, Mr. Way, how lovely! An excellent example from a first year, no less!" He glanced down at the other cauldron. "Er- Mr. Toro… perhaps redoing the brew would be best? I'm not sure this one can be salvaged…" he commented before sweeping past us and onto the next desk.</i>
</p><p>
  <i>A frown settled onto the boy's features and oddly, I found an unpleasant feeling, one I couldn’t quite put my finger on, sink to the pit of my stomach. </i>
</p><p>
  <i>"Shall I help you?" The question was out before I could stop myself. </i>
</p><p>
  <i>Why the hell had I just done that? I didn't associate with muggleborns and I certainly didn't tutor them! </i>
</p><p>
  <i>He looked up at me with an expression of surprise, a smile breaking across his face and making its way all the way up his eyes.</i>
</p><p>
  <i>The unpleasant feeling fell away to something else, something … warmer.</i>
</p><p>
  <i>"I would really appreciate that," he said in a voice so soft I almost didn't hear it.</i>
</p><p>
  <i>I gave a curt nod in reply. My stomach flipped. </i>
</p><p>
  <i>It was disgust. That was the only possibility. </i>
</p><p>
  <i>That's what I kept telling myself. </i>
</p><p>"Mikey? Mikey? Mikey?" </p><p>Who the fuck was shaking me?</p><p>I opened my eyes to the sight of my brother hovering over me, entirely too close for comfort. </p><p>"What the fuck," I mumbled as I scrambled around in sleepy confusion. </p><p>"We're almost there. You should get changed," Gerard said as he sat back down. He was already in his robes with his bright blue, Ravenclaw tie around his neck like a scarlet letter. </p><p>"Right, I'll just," I rummaged through my bag for my neatly folded robes,"I'll be right back." And with that, I was headed down the aisle of the train to the restroom. </p><p>There was something constricting about being back in my Hogwarts robes. Every time I donned that silver and green tie, I felt less like Mikey and more like Michael Way: esteemed heir of the house of Way. Nothing more than a pawn. A perfect son.</p><p>I sighed and exited the bathroom, opening the door and nearly colliding with another body.</p><p>
  <i>Ray Toro. Just my luck.</i>
</p><p>He flushed all the way from his neck to the roots of his unruly hair. Before he could even begin to stammer some unintelligible apology, I raised my hand in a signal to halt.</p><p>"Say nothing. I don't want to hear it. I would prefer to never hear a word from you or interact with you again after the events of last year," I said in a low but deadly voice. He may have gotten away earlier, but this was something I needed to handle before either of us set foot back in school. "I'm positive you have some kind of excuse, and that's fine. I don't care. But let this be known," I shifted my eyes so they were locked with his, "if you dare hurt Gerard, I will make your life a living hell, with means of torture you cannot even fathom. Have I made myself clear?"</p><p>Ray nodded, his eyes wide in utter terror. I gave a smirk and turned to head back down the train aisle.</p><p>"Oh, and Ray?" I paused my exit and glanced back over my shoulder. He was staring at the ground now. <i>Coward</i>.</p><p>"Ghosting the person who saved your life? Bit of a dick move. Just thought you should know."</p><p>And with that, I strutted away. </p><p>I was serious: <i>no</i> mudblood would ruin my year.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p><b>Ashes</b>: HELLO MAY THE GAY EMO MAGIC SAVE ALL YOUR ASSES IN QUARANTINE<br/><b>Gems</b>: It’s honestly saving mine haha, Mikey’s such an angsty little shit<br/><b>Ashes</b>: As God intended to be<br/><b>Gems</b>: Bold you you to call yourself god haha<br/><b>Ashes</b>: I AM AN UNDEFEATED EMO GOOODDD<br/><b>Gems</b>: REEEEEE, anyway we're gonna try and be consistent haha, to make up for it the next chapter is a biggen, + you’re gonna get to meet some new people (Wink wonk)<br/><b>Ashes</b>: and by people, we mean angsty gays<br/><b>Gems</b>: Thanks for the support, leave a kudo and a comment, we love them<br/><b>Ashes</b>: and feel free to follow Gems on ig @so_long_and_carry_on she screams about bands regularly, she posts cute aesthetic shit<br/><b>Gems</b>: stay safe everyone ^-^<br/><b>Ashes</b>: WASH YER DAMN HANDS!!! LOVE Y'ALL</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Brendon Urie, The Human Torch</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <b>Frank</b>
</p><p>This was it. We had arrived at Hogsmeade station with the sun hanging low on the horizon. I was feeling jittery and warm, despite the chilly night air, as I exited the train. The first years were instructed toward the boats and I started to weave my way through the crowd when I collided with a body.</p><p>"Oh, shit, I'm sorry-"</p><p>"No, my bad-"</p><p>I looked up and saw the boy, the angelic black haired one, staring down at me, wide-eyed.</p><p>
  <i>Shit, why is everyone taller than me?</i>
</p><p>"Uh, here, I'm sorry," he said, reaching down and grabbing my shoulderbag which I hadn't even noticed dropping.</p><p>I grabbed it back from him, probably looking like a moronic goldfish with my mouth opening and closing wordlessly.</p><p>"Uh- um- ahem, uh, thank you," I stammered out shifting my eyes to the ground and pulling the strap up my shoulder.</p><p>The boy giggled - actually <i>giggled</i> - and flashed the cutest smile ever.</p><p>"No problem. Nice pin, by the way," he said, gesturing to the Black Flag pin on the strap of my bag. </p><p>
  <i>Did he like Black Flag? Oh my God, he might actually be perfect- </i>
</p><p>"Thank you!" I blurted out, louder than was probably acceptable. He giggled again and I started walking along with the crowds, painfully aware that he was strolling next to me.</p><p>
  <i>Fuck. This was awkward.</i>
</p><p>"Um, so, you like a lot of bands?" <i>There, saved myself.</i></p><p>"Yeah, a fair few," he said with a smile, "Black Flag, Misfits, Smashing Pumpkins... Oh, Bowie!" </p><p>"What, where? Did he get out?" I started looking around, frantically, for my owl.</p><p>The boy frowned. "I'm... I'm sorry, what?" </p><p>
  <i>Wait, I'm an idiot, he's never even seen my owl, he doesn't even know me, shit he's cute, shit I'm GAY-</i>
</p><p>"Sorry, uh, my owl's name is Bowie and I... I don't... I'm sorry..." I trailed off awkwardly. This boy was going to think I was absolutely psychotic, or stupid, or who knew what. </p><p><i>Wow, I haven't even gotten to school yet and I've already cemented myself as an idiot</i>, I thought, feeling hopeless. </p><p>"Oh my God. That's the best name I've ever heard for an owl," the boy said with a huge grin. Relief flooded through me. Maybe I wasn't hopeless. </p><p><i>You might actually get a boyfriend at this school</i>, my traitorous mind supplied. I gave a laugh as I noticed us getting nearer to the lake.</p><p>"So, uh, do you have a name?"</p><p>~°~</p><p>
  <b>Gerard</b>
</p><p>He didn't know who I was. The cute boy from Jersey with a Black Flag pin on his bag and piercings in his ears didn't know I was the infamous Gerard Way, the disgrace to one of the purest and oldest wizard families in history, the laughing stock of Hogwarts. </p><p>It was miraculous. </p><p>"I'm Gerard Way, and you?" </p><p>"Frank Iero."</p><p>I smiled and shook his hand, contemplating the name. Frank. It seemed fitting, in a way. But, 'Iero'? Why did that sound so familiar? </p><p>"Nice to meet you," I said, extending a hand. He shook it, hesitantly, and I was surprised at how calloused his fingers felt. </p><p>
  <i>Wait, I've been holding on too long I should let go or this is weird-</i>
</p><p>"Likewise," he said and I pulled my hand away. He gave an adorable smile and shoved his hands into the pockets of his robes.</p><p>"Well," I said, suddenly feeling awkward, "uh, should probably head to the boats yeah? I'll see you around, Frank."</p><p>"Yeah. See you around, Gerard." And with that, he turned on his heel and dashed to the lake. </p><p>I grinned to myself. For the first time since Ray, I thought I might make a friend.</p><p>“So, who was that?” I nearly jumped out of my skin. </p><p>“Fuck, Mikey, make noise or something, you scared the shit out of me,” I said. My brother had this terrible habit of popping up out of nowhere. </p><p>“Who was he?” <i>Okay, he’s not going to drop that, apparently</i>. </p><p>“Some new first year. No one important,” I replied, praying that my face wasn’t as red as it felt. </p><p>“Does ‘No One Important’ have a name?” Mikey had an absolutely shit-eating grin on his face. Despite my embarrassment at my kid brother’s teasing, I felt strangely warm inside at his blatant encouragement of my liking boys. </p><p>“Yeah, Frank Iero.” And, suddenly, the grin was gone.</p><p>“Iero?” The venom in his tone was concerning me. </p><p>“Y-yeah? Wait, do we know his family? Oh, I <i>knew</i> the name sounded familiar. I-”</p><p>“God, Gerard you are just a magnet for trouble, aren't you? Fuckin’,” Mikey paused, pressing a finger to his temple in evident frustration, “<i>Frank. Iero</i>. How does that not ring a bell? Don’t you remember all the press? The big scandal??” </p><p>Clearly, my memory sucked, because I couldn’t think of the scenario Mikey was referring to. In our family’s circle of the wizarding world, there was a new scandal every week, it seemed. </p><p>Mikey gave a noise of irritation, “The Iero Scandal, Frank Iero, Sr. had an affair with a <i>muggle</i> woman. Frank Iero, <i>that</i> Frank Iero over there, is a bastard,” he continued in his best ‘how-stupid-are-you-Gerard’ tone. “I’m surprised he still uses that name.”</p><p>“He might not even know.” </p><p>Poor <i>kid</i>, I thought. </p><p>“In any case,” Mikey continued, “as much as I support you ‘loving whoever you want’ it would be in your best interest to keep it in the pureblood circle, and preferable someone without a massive scandal tied to their name.” With that, Mikey was taking me by the sleeve of my robes and dragging me toward the carriages. Still, I found myself gazing back toward the boats where Frank Iero was climbing into a boat with two other boys, oblivious to the weight of any scandals or preexisting reputations. </p><p>
  <b>Frank</b>
</p><p>The boat ride to the castle had been an experience, in more ways than one. The inky reflective surface of the lake rippled and swirled around us, creating the illusion that we were floating through a far away constellation. Though, at one point, I swore I saw something glide underneath us, which made me, hastily, sling myself back into the boat. </p><p>But that was nothing compared to the castle.</p><p>Growing up in New Jersey, the closest thing we had to a fortress was a White Castle chain down the street. So, as soon as we turned the corner of a rocky ridge and it came into view, I found myself grasping the bow of the boat in awe. </p><p>Rising up out of the fog, like some fantastical hallucination, it looked like it was torn straight out of the pages of my childhood story books. The only way I could think to describe it was majestic. It’s gargantuan expanse sprawled so far I could not see its end, some distant parts slipping into an ebony clump of trees. Ancient twirling turrets twisted precariously skyward, while below, grand glass windows, almost resembling ginormous eyes gave glimpses of an entirely new world within. The whole thing was lit up with warm golden lights that seemed to be entirely sourceless, the glow instead coming from within the very walls of the castle itself. </p><p>It was love at first sight.</p><p>There were gasps and excited exclamations from all of the surrounding boats, and a “Holy shit!” from somewhere behind me. A few moments and some boat rocking later, I felt another body slam up against me in, what I assumed was, an attempt to get a better look at the castle. I didn’t realise I had been leaning so far forward until I felt the boat lurch underneath me. </p><p>With not even enough time for an ‘<i>oh shit</i>’, I was sent slipping forward into the watery abyss below. Flailing my arms wildly, my hands managed to clamp onto the side of the boat at the last minute, but not before my head was sloshed under the water’s surface. To call the water freezing would an understatement; it was like fucking liquid nitrogen. Gasping as soon as my head breached the surface, I scuttled backwards at full speed, right into the legs of one of the kids on my boat.</p><p>“Holy crap, dude, are you okay?” Came a voice from above. I flicked my head back to get a look at its owner, realising a second too late that I had just flung a shower of lake water directly into his face, where it now trickled down his glasses. I noticed he had mousey brown hair swooping from his beanie and round little cherub cheeks, which were now scrunched up in disgust.</p><p>“Dude, you didn’t need to spray me too.” Mild annoyance laced his tone as he took off his glasses to wipe them on his robes. </p><p>I slipped up onto the seat next to him. “Shit, I’m sorry! I guess I wasn’t quite ready to take a dip in the lake yet,” I said. He chuckled as he slipped his glasses neatly back onto his nose. Realisation crossed his face as he suddenly leaned forward, scanning for something.</p><p>“Wait what the hell happened to that annoying kid-” But before he could even finish, there was an eruption from the water next to us. A mass of black robes thrashed wildly against the water in a desperate attempt to scramble back onto the boat. </p><p>Before either of us could even move, the kid was suddenly jolted into the air, as if on strings, and landed roughly back in the boat, which bobbed violently under his sudden weight. There was an eruption of laughter from the boats around us. <i>Kill me now</i>, I think, sinking into my robes. I glanced around for some sort of explanation and caught Hagrid some boats ahead tucking a pink umbrella back into his jacket. <i>What the hell is this Mary Poppins bullshit</i>?</p><p>My attention was brought back to the sodden mess in front of me which proceeded to cough half the lake up into the boat, much to the comical disgust of Glasses Kid. He finally flung his head back up, his mop of dark brown hair plastered over his eyes.</p><p>“Wooo! What a rush, I kinda wanna get back in there,” he let out, a beaming smile slapped across his face. I felt my jaw drop a little. <i>Are all wizards this much of a mental case</i>?</p><p>I turned to gauge Glasses Kid’s reaction, who, I was relieved to see, was looking just as fucking confused as I was.</p><p>“Are you insane!?” He sputtered out, eyeing the kid up and down like he was some sort of sea urchin that had just crawled out of the lakes depths.</p><p>The urchin in question swished his head around like a wet dog and ran his hands through his hair, revealing a sizable forehead and dark eyes, which twinkled in the half light.</p><p>“I mean, probably a little, but there's gotta be some wicked shit down there, like- like a whole civilisation of squid people or something!” </p><p>“Squid people?” Glasses scoffed, incredulously.</p><p>I considered adding to the conversation for a second, but anxiety crept up the back of my throat. Making friends had never been a talent of mine as most of the kids back at St. Mary’s had treated me like the devil’s spawn. </p><p>
  <i>No I’ve gotta, I promised Ma a new start, and I’m sure as hell gonna at least try. This time will be different. They’re all magic. Just like me. </i>
</p><p>“...Or like some Atlantis style treasure tomb?” I offered after a moment's hesitation “With some kinda eel hybrid guards.”</p><p>Water Boy immediately snapped his fingers and pointed at me, practically vibrating with excitement “Yes, YES! Exactly what I'm talking about!” I giggled when he threw himself right onto the seat between me and Glasses Boy, who immediately tried to scoot as far away as possible.</p><p>“Oh, I’m Brendon by the way, your neighborhood aqua tomb explorer.” Water Boy, Well, Brendon, continued with a shitty old timey accent. He held out a dripping hand for me to shake.</p><p>“I’m Frank, ready to pull a full Indiana Jones on those sons of bitches,” I replied, laughing and taking it. “Um what about you?” I threw over to Glasses Kid, who looked like he’d rather be anywhere else.</p><p>“I’m Patrick if you must know,” he said, eyes not meeting mine, “a non tomb raiding, non mutant fighting, totally normal dude,” he added with a tiny grin.</p><p>Brendon immediately threw his other, equally soggy, hand into Patrick’s, who made a sound of regret and disgust. Brendon only continued giggling, manically the whole time.</p><p><i>This kid is certifiably insane... I like him</i>, I thought. </p><p>“Get that sewer water off me! Wait-” Patrick paused and surveyed the other boats for a moment before leaning in and whispering: “I might know a spell to get you dried off.” Some unintelligible noise of excitement left my lips. “Wait, are we talking real magic?” I whisper shout making him jump and do a double take around us. We’d fallen to the back of the group. I couldn’t help but be excited as I’d had a spell-less experience so far, barring my trip to Olivanders.</p><p>“Well, what else would I be talking about, I said ‘spell’, didn't I?” He said with a roll of the eyes. Brendon and I both huddled in further on the cramped boat to watch. If Patrick felt any pressure, he certainly didn’t show it as he slipped his wand out of his robes. I wondered, for a moment, if I would soon feel that confident when wielding my wand.  </p><p>Suddenly, he was muttering a string of words that I couldn't catch under his breath while making some crazy pattern with his wand. I wasn’t sure if it worked or not until I felt a warm gust of air blow across my face in a steady stream from the wand. <i>Holy shit!</i> Brendon and I watched in amazement as he aimed it at our drenched robes, sending little water droplets flying from the strength of the spell. </p><p>Watching, we don matching awed expressions, while Patrick had found a slightly smug smile. Well, that was until the wand suddenly emitted a disgruntled little popping sound, before spluttering out a little puff of flame directly into Brendons robe arm, which immediately caught alight. <i>Oh fuck</i>.</p><p>Patrick's eyes immediately bulged in horror. He took up a chant of “Holy shit, holy shit, holy-” waving his hands around like a distressed penguin. After a moment he whipped around his head to see if anyone’s noticed. <i>We are so dead</i>.</p><p>“FUCK!” Brendon, who’s voice had now reached a new octave, starts to wave his arm around in panic, a brilliant orange torch flickering dangerously across the surface of the dark lake. This ironically only served to fuel the fire with more oxygen, making him wave it even more frantically. I was stuck watching this clusterfuck go down like a stunned rabbit for a few moments until, panicking, I grasped Brendon’s arm and dunked it into the lake with a satisfying singe. </p><p>We sat in a shocked silence for a couple seconds before Brendon turned around to Patrick with a sheepish grin “Was that supposed to happen?” </p><p>Patrick immediately turns bright red, “Well obviously not!” His voice, equal parts murderous and flustered, only made Brendon burst out in laughter again. I joined in after watching Patrick flail his arms around, trying to explain what went wrong while Brendon mimicked him, offering to show him ‘the right way’ to do it.</p><p>“GOD NO!” Screeched Patrick, immediately resorting to frantically grabbing for Brendon’s newly revealed wand to stop him. Brendon, taking full advantage of the other boy’s shortness, yanked it out of the way, above his head. I couldn’t help but smile. This place seemed alright, especially in comparison to the dumpster fire I’d left behind. I shuddered at the memory of the cramped lockers and busted lips.</p><p><i>No way in hell I’m going back there</i>, I decided firmly.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p><b>Gems</b>: Told y’all we’d get one out sooner, hope you all like the walking disaster that is Brendon<br/><b>Ashes</b>: Ryan Ross totally isn’t going to make an appearance any time soon….<br/><b>Gems</b>: We promise, next up: the dreaded sorting *Gasps*<br/><b>Ashes</b>: PLACE YOUR BETS NOW ON WHO ENDS UP IN WHICH HOUSE<br/><b>Gems</b>: Thanks for the support as always, leave a kudo and a comment cause we love em<br/><b>Ashes</b>: aaaaannd as always, *SHAMELESS PLUG* go follow Gems on IG @so_long_and_carry_on<br/><b>Gems</b>: Hahaha, stay safe everyone ^-^<br/><b>Ashes</b>: STAY INSIDE AND WASH! YOUR! DAMN! HANDS!!!!! Love y’all!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. What the Hell is a Hufflepuff?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <b>Frank</b>
</p><p>The image I had of the ‘Great Hall’ was immediately dwarfed as those grand oak doors opened up to reveal the cavernous chamber within. The whole place absolutely screamed magic, from the homley candles which were, oh yeah, <i>fucking leviating</i>, to the twinkling stary sky above us, which rippled with distant nebulas and galaxies. </p><p>We marched along in a huddle between four imposing tables. While I was taking in the grandeur of the hall, I caught a glimpse of a familiar head of dark hair. </p><p><i>It’s that Gerard guy</i>. </p><p>He seemed to almost immediately catch my gaze from where he was perched up at the far end of a table which was situated under massive blue banners. He was alone, I noticed with a frown. Pushing that aside, I smiled like an idiot and waved at him, before realising I must look like a complete dumbass. Upon noticing this, he quickly turned his gaze back to the table, bringing his hand up to cover his mouth. I immediately looked down at my feet in embarrassment. <i>Fuck, you had one job, why am I like this</i>?? I fought the urge to slap myself.</p><p>The three of us from The Boat Incident had stayed pretty close together, equally terrified of what was to come. Well, some of us more than others.</p><p>“OOOO, do you see that dark haired kid up the end looking like he’s about to murder that guy across from him?” Brendon whispered, his hand wrapped into the crook of my elbow, tugging and pointing like a toddler. </p><p>“Uh, yeah?” The kid in question was at the table under the green banners, wearing a look packed with so much venom that I was surprised the other guy hadn’t dropped dead right then and there.</p><p>“That’s my friend Ryan. RYAN!” He continued turning to face the boy, voice cutting through the idle chatter of the hall and turning some heads as he shouted, “RYAN, HEYYY!” all while waving his arms around frantically like a lunatic. <i>Okay, at least I wasn’t that bad</i>. </p><p>The shaggy haired kid in question turned his glare on Brendon - well, at this point it had become less of a glare and more of a horrified scowl - before proceeding to sink onto the bench and slump into his robes, his cheeks flaming a little from beneath his scarf. <i>I feel you buddy</i>, I thought, shifting quietly behind Patrick.</p><p>Patrick eyed him cautiously. “Wait, he’s a Slytherin?” Patrick's voice held some insinuation of judgement that I didn’t quite understand. Professor McGonagall had just explained the sorting ceremony to us, though I wasn’t sure which house was which. Was there some sort of dirt around Slytherins that I wasn’t aware of?</p><p>Brendon raised an eyebrow at him, looking slightly serious for once. “Um, yeah. And?” </p><p>Patrick shuffled awkwardly. “No, nothing just, I heard that Slytherins have a reputation<br/>
for being, well, kind of evil.” <i>So I’m guessing that Slytherin is the name of that green house</i>, I thought as I eyed them with scepticism.</p><p><i>Are they all harbouring some sort of secret murder plot or something</i>? I saw another face that I recognised, though it was not nearly as comforting as Gerard’s. </p><p><i>Shit, that blonde dude from the train</i>. He sat surrounded by a platoon of other Slytherins, who all watched him with rapt attention as he flicked his hair back, hanging on his every word as he plowed on with some story I couldn’t hear. His gaze suddenly flicked upwards towards me but I darted my eyes away before we could make contact. <i>Close call</i>, I thought. </p><p>Brendon actually scowled, the first real negative expression I had seen from the boy. “That’s bullshit, Slytherins are just like all the other houses, and besides, Ryan. Isn’t. Evil.” He muttered with a sense of finality. I looked up again at the boy in question who had resumed his mission of trying to melt a hole through that other kid with his eyes alone. <i>Um, are you sure about that</i>? I thought, skeptically. </p><p>“Whatever, I just wanna end up in Ravenclaw,” Patrick huffed, looking longingly at the table where Gerard was seated. <i>What the hell is up with these names</i>?</p><p>Before I could open my mouth to ask what the hell any of them were talking about, we reached the front of the hall. Before us was a long table packed with an assortment of adults, who I assumed were to be our teachers, and a solitary stool with the ugliest hat I had ever seen. </p><p><i>What the hell is that for</i>? I thought, mildly repulsed by the idea of having to touch it. Without cue, silence fell throughout the hall, filling me with unease. <i>What happens now</i>?</p><p>Then, with no warning, the thing opened up what I could only assume was a mouth and began to belt out this god-awful ancient ballad. I quite literally jumped back in surprise, knocking into Patrick, who cringed as the hat sang a note clearly out of its range.</p><p>Once it had finished everyone cheered and I awkwardly clapped. McGonnagall cleared her throat. The chatter dissipated as everyone turned their heads towards us, looking on with a hawkish anticipation. I suddenly felt extremely small under their gazes. </p><p>“When I call your name, please step forward, sit down and I will place the Sorting Hat on your head to sort you into your houses,” she said, her tone strict and instructional. <i>Oh God, are you kidding me, in front of everyone</i>? I felt a hole open up in the pit of my stomach. Patrick stiffened up beside me, making me feel a little better. <i>At least I’m not the only royally mortified by this</i>.  </p><p>“Cadwell, Amelia.” A tall, thin, ginger haired girl slipped silently out of the crowd and took her place upon the stool. McGonagall immediately lowered the hat onto her head. Its creepy mouth split open like some stop motion animation and frowned, silent for a moment, before belting out “HUFFLEPUFF!” The yellow table on the left roared with excitement as she slunk off towards them wordlessly, a little frown on her face. </p><p>The more people that were called up, the more nervous I got, especially after some girl got pissy after getting placed in Slytherin. <i>God what the hell is wrong with Slytherin</i>?</p><p>“Galdenstock, Rob.” She calls out, breaking me out of my thoughts. <i>Shit mines gotta be soon</i>, I realised as my heart threatened to up and vacate the premise. Galdenstock, which christ what an unfortunate last name, was sorted into Ravenclaw and McGonagall shifted the long sprawling parchment in her hand.</p><p>“Iero, Frank.” <i>Mother fucker</i>.</p><p>The hall fell into an eerie half silence; the kind where people are clearly murmuring under their breath but trying not to be heard. I was all too familiar with the sound as it had been the soundtrack of the halls in school everyday back in Jersey. <i>Why? What did I do?</i> This place was supposed to be different.</p><p>And it would be. </p><p>Determined not to let this shake me, I squared my shoulders, and slipped out from the crowd, Patrick nodding at me while Brendon pulled a cheesy thumbs up. I slumped into the chair a little too hard, causing it to teeter precariously under me, but I quickly regained balance. There were a couple more murmurs from the crowd, I noticed ruefully as I sat down, <i>Not even sorted and people are already judging me, great</i>, I thought. But I tried not to focus on them.</p><p>My eyes scanned the crowd and once again found Gerard’s, dark but soothing, looking straight back up at me; like he could tell exactly how I was feeling in that moment. For a second, he almost looked hopeful.</p><p>Without warning I felt the scratchy fabric of the hat fall on my head. </p><p>‘<i>Iero, aye? That’s a name I haven’t heard in a while...</i>’ Wait, I didn't think that, <i>What the hell?!</i></p><p>‘<i>Where to put you…</i>’ After a moment I realised it was the fucking hat. <i>The hat… knew my name?  What kind of Professor X bullshit is this? God can it read my mind</i>? I wondered, the idea making my skin crawl.</p><p>
  ‘<i>Of course I can, what kind of respectful piece of enchanted clothing would I be if I couldn’t? But I don’t need mind reading to know</i> that <i>name</i>’ The creepy voice responded, <i>I mean shit, not creepy very, uh, not creepy?? Oh god it’s in my head</i>! <i>Fuck, what did it mean about my name?! </i>
</p><p>
  “Better be…. SLYTHERIN!” The last part was yelled aloud and my heart sank. <i>Fuck</i>. The table on the far right exploded with cheers as I sat like a stunned toad on the stool. I desperately looked out at the crowd and I noticed some smiling faces had turned to scowls. 
</p><p>
  And then I saw Gerard. 
</p><p>
  His expression was no longer the nervously warm one it had been before, but rather something entirely different. His mouth was drawn up into a firm line, a look I couldn’t quite read from this far away on his face. Before I could question it further, there was a hand on my shoulder.
</p><p>
  “Go on, now, Mr. Iero,” McGonagall whispered in my ear. I got up in a daze and, in what I hoped was a confident fashion, made my way toward the Slytherin table. Deciding to avoid the only two I knew, because they both honestly scared the living shit out of me, I settled amongst some other first years while trying to ignore the bubbling feeling of unease in my stomach.
</p><p>
  Patrick would go on to join me in Slytherin. Though, surprisingly, he didn’t seem as crestfallen as I expected him to; he simply slid onto the bench next to me with a little smile. Brendon ended up with the Gryffindors at the opposite end, who all seemed as ADHD prone as him, so I supposed that was a perfect fit.
</p><p>
  <i>At least I have one person I know that isn’t probably going to kill me in my house</i>, I thought to myself, half-heartedly.
</p><p>
  I was kind of scared of how things were going to go from there. I had no clue about the<br/>
future, but this whole Slytherin thing sort of soured it.
</p><p>
  <i>God, I hope I haven’t just been put in with a bunch of crazy axe murders</i>, I thought, though, judging by the ones I had seen, I didn’t like my chances. I looked down the table at that Ryan kid who I noticed was glaring over at the Gryffindor table with some unreadable expression. 
</p><p>
  <i>I hope everyone’s wrong about them</i>, I thought, as I glared up at the serpentine banners, <i>well, I suppose it’s us now isn’t it</i>?
</p><p>
    <b>Gerard</b>
</p><p>
  As soon as we stepped off the carriages Mikey seemed to melt away like a shadow, I turned to ask him a question but he was gone. After a scan of the other hoards of students I noticed he’d fallen in with his usual crowd on Slytherin’s. They were the living stereotype: pretentious, elitist motherfuckers who worshipped the fucking ground Mikey stood on. So why did I envy them so much?
</p><p>
  Swarms of my peers split off and pulled away from me like a river round a rock, I could already feel that familiar sense of isolation seeping in and prickling at my skin. Ahead, the castle glowed dully, cementing me in the nightmare for real.
</p><p>
  <i>No escape now</i>, I thought with a sigh. It was fine, just another year in hell.
</p><p>
 ~°~
</p><p>
  <i>Whoever said that your house is like your family is full of shit</i>, I thought, as I regarded the small hemisphere around me which all the over Ravenclaws were treating like a quarantine zone. They seemed to have no problem flicking glances up at me every once in a while, though, with all the unspoken judgement of ‘You don’t belong here’. I knew that’s what they meant. Each time, I felt it like a laser targeted hex but, each time, I continued to nonchalantly eye up the candle sticks above me, as though it wasn’t my hundredth time seeing them.
</p><p>
  I was saved from any more glares when the door to the Great Hall swung open to reveal a huddle of first years behind it, led by the ever steely Professor McGonagall. But she was the least of my worries when I caught the eye of one of the newest tragic cases to join the Hogwarts freak show this year: Mr. Frank Iero. He, clearly, hadn’t caught wind of this fact yet, practically beaming with excitement as ogled the scene.
</p><p>
  <i>God, what I wouldn’t give to be unaware of the stories spread about me</i>. 
</p><p>
  My regularly scheduled self pitying tirade was cut short, however, when he actually smiled up at me. I was so taken aback that for once my mind drew a complete blank. 
</p><p>
    <i>Surely, he must be joking...</i>
</p><p>
  But within a couple more moments he actually waved at me. I felt the heat rise in my face before I could even react. I had to look away. Against my will, a smile crawled it’s way up onto my lips. 
</p><p>
  As sad as it sounded, in my last four years here, exactly one person had ever smiled at me, and he and I weren’t exactly on the best terms right now. 
</p><p>
 As I covered the offending grin with my hand, I just sat there in stunned silence. For a fleeting moment, I let my imagination run away with the fantasy of another infamous outcast.
</p><p>
  But the doubt trickled in when I saw the boys around him, laughing and pulling him along.
</p><p>
  <i>God am I really this hot and bothered over one conversation and a smile</i>? 
</p><p>
  He probably already had friends, he probably was just being polite.
</p><p>
  I watched him look over at something, and as I followed his gaze my heart sank when I saw Mikey at the end of it. 
</p><p>
  <i>Not even five seconds in the door and Mikey’s already got another one on the hook</i>, I bet. I frowned down at the table, picking at a stray splitter. I felt the doubt bloom in my chest.
</p><p><i>'He’ll never be as hated as you. As worthless as you. As</i> alone <i>as you</i>', my mind taunted and teased. I picked harder at flaking wood, ripping it off with a scowl. I couldn’t be bothered to argue with my thoughts because I knew it was true. </p><p>The tension grew in the pit of my stomach as I heard the first name being called off the list. I tried to not get too invested, instead busying myself instead with a rouge candle that trailed drowsily along above. But my traitorous thoughts kept me glancing over every couple seconds to see how far along we are. When it hits G I flick my eyes over to the front. I see Iero shifting nervously on the balls of his feet. </p><p>“Iero, Frank”</p><p>And suddenly, it was my sorting ceremony all over again. The Great Hall filled with poorly stifled whisperings and caught a few. “That’s the infamous Iero Bastard? He looks like a chav.’ One girl scoffed from further down the table, met with giggles from those around her. My eyebrow twitched.‘If you’re gonna have a world class scandal attached to your name, you’ve gotta at least be hot enough to pull it off…’ A snobbish nazelly boy whisper shouted back.</p><p>I could feel my anger rising at the words of my peers, while watching, nervously, as the boy took note of the crowd’s chatter. He shocked me, though, as he strode to the stool with an air of complete confidence, <i>How could he pull that off?</i> I mused. I had to stifle my smirk when he nearly tumbled straight off it, but somehow it only came off as endearing. It was, of course, at that moment when he chose to look straight at me, which sent a little warm shock wave up my body. The beginnings of a smile crept onto my face but then the hat was on his head and I realised I couldn’t bear to watch. </p><p>...</p><p>“Slytherin!”</p><p>The smile withered and died immediately. <i>There was no way...</i></p><p>He didn’t exactly seem thrilled with the placement, his gaze meeting mine again with a lot more trepidation this time. <i>But he probably doesn’t know what’s just fallen into his lap</i>.</p><p>“<i>Every real pureblood ends up in Slytherin, so what does that make you</i>?” The childhood memory clawed mercilessly through my mind and made me scowl as I watched him trudge off towards the table behind me. </p><p>Frank Iero: The infamous bastard, though an Iero nonetheless, slipped in amongst the other first year Slytherins. He fit right in.</p><p>‘<i>I told you</i>’ The voice in my head jeered ‘<i>How many times do you need to be burned to know you’re alone. You’re pathetic.</i>’</p><p>It only took a wave and a smile... God I really <i>was</i> pathetic. I was losing my touch.</p><p>I tried to ignore the sinking disappointment.</p><p>Evidently, the universe had deemed it fit to make sure I could never have a friend. </p><p>Soon enough, he would be surrounded by all of <i>those</i> kids. Soon enough, he would hear the rumors, the stories. </p><p>Soon enough, Frank Iero would hate me. But that didn't matter.</p><p>I would simply have to hate him first.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p><b>Gems</b>: Sooo yeah this chapter’s <i>maybe</i> a little late...Sorry haha<br/><b>Ashes</b>: I have to say, you all made some great guesses! And some that kinda missed the mark! But that's ok! You can’t read our minds!<br/><b>Gems</b>: <b>RyanRoss TM</b> has arrived and graced us with his angst<br/><b>Ashes</b>: He totally doesn’t have a thing for Brendon and Ryden totally isn’t going to make an appearance whaaaatttt….<br/><b>Gems</b>: Of course not, Ryden? In THIS household, with THESE tags, never<br/>Ashes: NOPE NEVER I DON”T EVEN KNOW WHAT RYDEN IS I-<br/><b>Gems</b>: So thank y'all so much for the support, we love the comments so leave plenty haha<br/><b>Ashes</b>: AND A KUDO WOOHOOOOOOO also go follow Gems on IG @so_long_and_carry_on<br/><b>Gems</b>: Stay safe everyone ^-^</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Help Me This is Gonna be Nuts</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p><b>Ashes</b>: Ok… so. I dreamt up this absolute disaster of a chapter plan… I take full responsibility and blame for the immense confusion you are all about to experience...<br/><b>Gems</b>: So basically, we didn't want a bunch of 12 year olds running around making out cause that's kinda weird, so we did this sorta insight into the three years between when Frank starts at Hogwarts and when the main action starts, so here’s this chaotic mess. Btw all the year markers are referring to Franks year at Hogwarts<br/><b>Ashes</b>: SO JUST TO MAKE SURE WE’RE TOTALLY CLEAR: this chapter starts when Frank is first year, Mikey is in his second, Ray and Gee are fourth AND IT ENDS where Frank is finishing third year, Mikey finishing fourth, and Ray and Gee finishing sixth. WE CLEAR? NO? GOOD. ENJOY.<br/><b>Gems</b>: All these snippets take place across the years, chronologically, but not consecutively, with a few exceptions. It's kinda a lot, but hey at least it's longer than usual. It was so long that we had to cut out a few ideas that were necessarily plot important but are more wholesome/chaotic, so let us know if you wanna see them in a bonus chapter</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <b>~ Year 1 ~</b>
</p><p>
  <b>Gerard's POV</b>
</p><p>It was hard enough to watch my baby brother surpass me by exceeding everyone's expectations and being perfect at everything. But with Mikey, it was less painful because, deep down, I was proud of him. He worked incredibly hard and he took great pride in his successes.</p><p>With Frank, I wanted to punch something. Not only did he place out of first year potions and into the FOURTH YEAR LEVEL as a muggleborn with no training, he also managed to make it on the Quidditch team. He was only a beater, but still, he was a first year. And the worst part was, he hardly tried. He was effortlessly perfect and didn't bother to brag or show any sort of pride. He remained infuriatingly indifferent. </p><p>I wondered what it was like to have everything you could want simply fall into your hands.</p><p>~°~</p><p>
  <b>Mikey</b>
</p><p>That Iero boy was getting on my last nerve. It was mortifying. A <i>mudblood</i> showed me up in potions. </p><p>I was going to fucking <i>destroy him</i>.</p><p>~°~</p><p>
  <b>Frank</b>
</p><p>The staircases were fucking me up. They kept moving and, sure, that older kid Vic had warned me about that, but it didn't stop my stomach from dropping every time I got stuck on one mid shift. </p><p>This time was far worse though. This time, the staircase had stopped with the base facing a dead end and the top attached to fucking nothing. </p><p>I was, quite literally, trapped. </p><p>Staring down over the railing, I shuddered and sank to my knees. The height didn't bother me, but the sense of being trapped there was awful. It was the wizard world equivalent of getting stuck in an elevator. </p><p>"Ugh," I groaned, loudly, into the empty stairwell and laid my head on my knees. Apparently, I wasn't going anywhere any time soon.</p><p>"Um, you okay?" I jerked my head up in the direction of the soft voice. There, one flight up, was a boy with the wildest head of hair I had ever seen, staring at me with hesitant concern.</p><p>"Uh, not really, no," I said with a shrug. He grimaced. </p><p>There was a beat of silence before, "you want some help?" I wasn't sure how he intended to help but it couldn't hurt. </p><p>"Sure," I said.</p><p>"Okay, grab a hold of your book bag." </p><p><i>The fuck? </i> </p><p>"Just trust me." I rolled my eyes and did as I was told. </p><p>"Ahem, <i>wingardium leviosa</i>," he chanted and OH SHIT- </p><p>My bag was floating. With me attached to it. I was fucking floating and then descending onto the same flight of stairs as my mysterious rescuer. </p><p>"Holy shit, dude, that was insane!" I exclaimed. </p><p>"Simple levitation spell," he shrugged, "you'll learn it soon, I'm sure." He was shifting nervously, now, and inching down the stairs away from me. </p><p>"Hey, you got a name?" He paused with his back to me.</p><p>"Ray Toro." </p><p>~*~</p><p>
  <b>Mikey</b>
</p><p>Ray was being weird. Weirder than normal. And that was saying something. </p><p>I knew he was avoiding Gerard (for reasons unknown), but this was a whole new level. He wouldn’t even <i>look</i> at Gee and seemed to be making it his goal to remain on opposite ends of the campus from my brother at all times.</p><p>
  <i>Hard to do when you're in the same year and have classes together…</i>
</p><p>But then it dawned on me: Ray wasn’t just avoiding Gee. He was avoiding… well, everyone.</p><p>
  <i>What the hell is going on here? </i>
</p><p>~°~</p><p>
  <b>Frank</b>
</p><p>I was lucky. Who knew that being an A student in chemistry would transfer so well into potions?<br/>
Somehow, I had managed to brew every potion perfectly in the first class and, much to my surprise, the professor decided to assess me further. </p><p>I was set to start in the fourth year's potion class at the start of the next week. Seriously. <i>What the fuck</i>.</p><p>Flying was fun, too. I had never been good at sports (my life in PE back in Jersey had been HELL) but, apparently, Malfoy wanted me to be on the Quidditch team. I was <i>wanted</i> for a sports team. </p><p>But first, I needed to figure out what the fuck Quidditch was.</p><p>~°~</p><p>
  <b>Ray</b>
</p><p>For the first time in months, I felt human. I wasn’t sure why I was letting the strange American boy talk to me, but, ever since that incident on the stairs, he was showing up everywhere. It was like I couldn’t avoid running into him. So when the first year sat down across from me in the library and, wordlessly, cracked open a book like he wasn’t completely obliterating my social outcast status, I wasn’t sure what to think. And then I noticed a very familiar logo doodled on his notes. </p><p>Frank Iero liked the Misfits. <i>The Misfits</i>. It was rare to find a single wizard here who liked even the most mainstream of muggle bands. The only person I had found who even knew of The Misfits so far was… well, <i>him</i>. Him and his brother...</p><p>I couldn’t stop myself from commenting. </p><p>Frank was a strange boy. He had all the makings of a popular student and yet, he fit in nowhere. He was a walking oxymoron: simultaneously an outcast and respected by everyone. He didn't even seem to realize that he was special. Intelligent. Talented. </p><p>He was so much like Gee.</p><p>Visions of a bloodsoaked school shirt flashed in my mind.</p><p><i>Don’t get too close</i>, I reminded myself. </p><p>~°~</p><p>
  <b>Gerard</b>
</p><p>He was sitting next to me in potions. </p><p>"That's not a good plan," I said as soon as I saw Frank going for the seat to my right.</p><p>"How so?" He replied, so blissfully oblivious.</p><p>"No one ever sits next to me."</p><p>"And?" </p><p>"Do you want to destroy your social status?"</p><p>"Nope, I just wanna sit next to you," he said with a shrug.</p><p>My heart jumped. I paused to remind myself that this boy was the embodiment of frustration and a physical manifestation of everything I had failed to be. I reminded myself that I hated him. I <i>needed</i> to hate him.</p><p>He fumbled with his quill and made the dumbest whooping sound as he caught it.</p><p>I sighed. Hating him was going to be hard; he was cute.</p><p>~°~</p><p>
  <b>Frank</b>
</p><p>Aside from Patrick and Brendon, I hadn’t exactly made a lot of friends at school. I supposed Ryan could be considered a friend, but he was older and really only hung around me when Brendon was near. Patrick was nice to hang out with, but he was quiet and preferred to stay immersed in books. Or he was busy running from some third year named Pete. Tyler, this one second year Ravenclaw, was really chill but he was usually wrapped around some boy named Josh (<i>boyfriend maybe? </i>) and no matter what you talked to him about, you wound up lost. </p><p>Ray Toro was nice. I wasn’t sure what it was about him that made me want to befriend him, but something about his shy manner or the way he walked around like he was trying to be 6 inches shorter, was endearing. </p><p>I just wanted to know him. </p><p>~°~</p><p>
  <b>Ray</b>
</p><p>Frank had made a habit of sitting next to me every day now when we would study in the library. </p><p>We weren’t friends.</p><p>But there were moments where it felt like we were. </p><p>~°~</p><p>
  <b>Patrick</b>
</p><p>The air was practically crackling with anticipation, though I would be lying if I said I understood it at all. I was stuck at the front of the Slytherin stocks, so I had a great view of scarlet and emerald blurs barreling past, occasionally. I groaned as one boy pushed me over to get a better view of THE Michael Way, our seeker, as he plunged straight down in front of us, clearly hot on the snitch’s tail. I rolled my eyes; honestly this whole quidditch business made no sense. </p><p>
  <i>Why the hell wouldn’t they just catch the snitch as soon as the game starts? It’s so simple? </i>
</p><p>Logic aside, I still hated being out here, the summer sun beating down on me while I was jostled around by a bunch of rowdy meatheads. <i>Thrilling</i>. But I promised Frank I’d go. I caught sight of him, momentarily, as he streaked after a bludger near the Gryffindor stands. Narrowing my eyes, I glared at the blurry, yet obnoxiously colorful blob behind him.</p><p>I pulled out one of the enchanted seeing scopes they’d given out before the match to get a better look. </p><p>Of course, I didn’t need them to know it was Brendon, his high-pitched chants carrying across the stadium.</p><p>“THAT’S RIGHTTT! FUCK IT UP PETE! GRYFFINDOR LETS GOOOOO!” </p><p>I smirked; he was decked out head to toe in scarlet and gold, face paint and all, stringing around an obnoxiously large banner that would occasionally explode glitter everywhere. I frowned for a second as I saw him nudge the tall lanky kid next to him.</p><p>“Ryan?!” I looked back from the scope to realise he’d completely disappeared from beside me. <i>So much for house loyalty</i>.</p><p>I looked back through the scope in time to see Brendon forcing a flag bearing the Gryffindor Lion into his hands. He then started flinging his own flag around, seemingly in demonstration, before nodding over to Ryan eagerly. <i>This should be interesting</i>, I thought with a smirk, waiting for Ryan to blow up at Brendon. But, after staring the other boy in the eyes for a moment, he half heartedly flailed the flag above his head in defeat. I was speechless. </p><p>Brendon began whooping beside him, while a couple confused Gryffindors came over to Ryan, presumably to question him. I couldn’t hear what they were talking about, but Ryan’s pissed off retort was decidedly undercut by the mad blush across his face. <i>Oh look, now he’s matching with Brendon</i>, I thought snidely, my attention getting drawn, again, back into the game as Frank whizzed past my lense. </p><p>I had to admire his focus; it was as if he had a tracking spell on the bludger as he chased it across the pitch, swooping in and out of the stocks, even momentarily disappearing into the underbelly of the pitch after one had tracked on our seeker, only for it to reemerge ahead of him, being sent skyward. </p><p>He was good, I knew that much.</p><p>“Go Frank!!” I heard someone shout from the Hufflepuff stands. Confused, I zoomed my scope in to see that fourth year kid I had seen with Frank - <i>Ray I think? </i>. He looked extremely nervous and obviously uncomfortable even being there. But a quick look at Frank's face and the big smile plastered across it told me Frank appreciated it. </p><p>
  <i>Since when had those two been friends? </i>
</p><p>“LET’S GO FRANK!!” Roared Brendon from the other side of the pitch. I stifled a giggle as he received some confused double takes from his peers before looking back at Frank who was streaking after a rather fast bludger. </p><p>This particular one was beelining for one of our chasers, Merelda or something, at mach speed, only a few feet ahead of the Slytherin Stand. But Frank, on his old school broom was somehow keeping pace beside it, inching ever so slowly ahead, eyes focused, bat reared until:</p><p>
  <i>THWACK! </i>
</p><p>The lump of iron was flung away as Frank grunted at the effort, left panting in the aftermath. </p><p>
  <i>That was a close one. </i>
</p><p>Suddenly, I looked along its new path and spotted a Gryffindor chaser, intently focused on the quaffle on the opposite side of the pitch. The bludger flying, even faster from Frank’s hit, directly towards her head. </p><p>
  <i>Shit she hasn’t seen it! </i>
</p><p>Some of the crowd seem to also pick this up but the reaction time was too slow. </p><p>It happened in seconds. I bolted up in my seat to try and warn her, as realisation dawned on Frank’s face while he tried, in vain, to chase after it. It was inches from her when:</p><p>
  <i>THWACK! </i>
</p><p>A secondary hit went off as a crimson blur clipped the projectile from the side, casting it away from her. <i>Who’s</i>- I started to think before realising the new path the bludger had taken.</p><p>I only had time to put up my hands before I heard the crunch of metal on flesh, and my hand felt like it was on fire.</p><p>“MOTHERFUCKER!” I screeched out, slumping into the railing for support. I was vaguely aware, through the pain, of a couple people around me making way as two players touched down beside me.</p><p>“Patrick! Holy shit are you okay?!” Came Frank’s panicked shout from beside me. Before I could even respond, he was laying into the other player who’d joined us.</p><p>“Jesus Christ Wentz! What were you thinking?! I know you’re competitive but I thought you’d at least be above targeting the audience you asshole!” Frank was at the other boy’s throat, squaring up to him. If my hand hadn’t been shattered, I would have been laughing my ass off at how ridiculous Frank looked squaring up to a dude that was a head taller than him. </p><p>“What the fuck?! Do you think I <i>wanted</i> this to happen?!” ‘Wentz’ recoiled at the accusation. <i>American</i>? I thought with intrigue. He continued trying to explain himself to Frank, hands flailing wildly whilst trying to step back from the tiny Slytherin who just wouldn’t let up.</p><p>I got my first proper look at this allusive ‘Wentz’ and I was honestly surprised he was a beater. He was a head taller than Frank granted, clearly older, but he was skinny as anything. Black, short cropped hair clashed against his bronze tan; he was like none of the other pasty British kids. He stood out like a sore thumb. <i>Who the hell was this guy?</i></p><p>“What in Merlin’s name is happening here?” Came a snobbish drawl which I had come to associate with our head of house. They both froze, and sure enough when I looked behind me there he was, towering above us all. </p><p>Frank immediately swung into action. “Wentz tried to fuckin-” he tried to catch himself too late “To knock out my friend, Professor!”</p><p>The first-nameless ‘Wentz’ immediately turned to the professor. “No way, that’s fucked up, I’d never pull a stunt like that!” He then turned to me, which drew me off guard. “Are you okay? Holy shit little dude I’m so sorry, we gotta get you to a nurse or like-“ he started bumbling until Malfoy coughed to interrupt him.</p><p>“Wentz. As you were the one to take Mr. Stumph here out of action, you should be the one to take him to the hospital wing, I mean,” He turned to Frank and me with a smirk, an undeniable competitive glint in his eye, “it’s only fair, right?” </p><p>I immediately knew that was bullshit; he just wanted an excuse to get Wentz out of the rest of the game. Malfoy made no secret of his competitive streak when it came to quidditch. </p><p>Frank glared at Wentz before softening up on seeing his genuinely miserable state. “You better look after him Wentz, I’m warning you, if a precious hair on his fedora’d head is harmed imma make you wish the bludger hit you instead.” With a little smile at me, he was gone.</p><p>
  <i>Malfoy’s fucking wrong if he thinks I’m going to have the embarrassment of being taken down to the medical wing like some little lost first year. I know my shit dude. </i>
</p><p>“Yeah I’m good, don’t worry” I put up my hands to reassure them only to flinch when my hand shifted. Wentz was immediately in front of me, looking concerned.</p><p>“No way little dude, I’m taking you up there, can you stand?” He asked gingerly. Malfoy had already vanished, <i>useful</i> as always.</p><p>“It was my hand you fucking idiot, of course I can WALK-“ I was cut off, suddenly being flung up and over the boy’s shoulders. <i> WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK IS WRONG WITH THIS GUY</i>. For such a twig, he was deceptively strong.</p><p>“I’ve got ya, let’s get going.” His annoyingly cheery voice sounded from over my shoulder. </p><p>I immediately started flailing in his grasp, my face bright red from both the effort and the attention we were drawing. “Put me down you fucking meathead!” I screeched.</p><p>“Sh, little guy, I don’t want you to hurt yourself anymore than you already are,” he said calmly, as he continued carrying me away.</p><p>“WHO ARE YOU CALLING LITTLE?” I bellowed at him, thrashing as hard as I could. Finally, the idiot seemed to get the picture and set me down. I huffed and straightened my robes, sizing the boy up.</p><p>
  <i>Barely an inch on me, who does he think he is-</i>
</p><p>“Wow,” he said, gazing at me, dumbstruck. My face flamed again, the tips of my ears growing hotter.</p><p>“W-what?” His face split into a blinding grin.</p><p>“You’re precious.”</p><p>
  <i>Oh that is-</i>
</p><p>I gave a tight smile. “You know? I think I can find my way on my own,” I gritted the words out through my teeth.</p><p>“Are you sure? You-”</p><p>“<i>FLIPENDO! </i>”</p><p>
  <b>~ Year 2 ~</b>
</p><p>
  <b>Mikey</b>
</p><p>It had been a year, and Ray <i>still</i> wasn't speaking to Gerard. Yet, he was more than happy to busy himself with that ridiculous muggleborn, Frank Iero. </p><p>Fucking <i>ridiculous</i>. </p><p>I wasn't letting this go, no way in hell. Something was up and I needed to know. It didn't bother me that the mudblood had decided to ditch my brother, but doing so without reason and immediately after I saved his damn life was inexcusable. </p><p>I had decided the best plan of action was to keep tabs on him. Who knew what he was thinking up in that deranged mind of his. </p><p>At the moment, he was down the table from me, simply finishing some homework.</p><p>So what if I jinxed his inkpot to explode all over his essay for Professor Malfoy? </p><p>~°~ </p><p>
  <b>Gerard</b>
</p><p>Was it wrong to ogle someone who you were supposed to hate?</p><p>Frank was too busy being a beater to notice. I decided it was fine, so long as I didn't get caught.</p><p>~°~ </p><p>
  <b>Frank</b>
</p><p>I thought I would have Hogwarts figured out by the second year, but, alas, I was stuck on the changing staircases again. </p><p>"Shit," I muttered as the marble came to a halt. </p><p>For the second time now, I was stuck on a staircase to nowhere, except this time, there was no Ray in sight to levitate me to safety. Briefly, I considered <i>wingardium leviosa-ing</i> myself off the stairs but then I remembered that I was shit at charms. </p><p>“Ugh,” I groaned, with a maddening sense of deja vu. I turned around to head back down a few steps and wait it out.</p><p>And there he was. </p><p>Gerard Way. </p><p>He froze like a deer in the headlights, before turning tail to flee. Except, there was a dead end.</p><p>
  <i>Well. Shit. </i>
</p><p>Now, I was trapped on a staircase to nowhere <i>with</i> my crush who liked to either pretend I didn’t exist or treat me with nothing but cold sarcasm.</p><p>Slowly, he turned back around. </p><p>“Uh. Hi,” he said with the most awkward yet adorable half-wave. </p><p>“Hey,” I replied. He was beet red. “You, uh, okay?” I asked.</p><p>“I’m okay,” he replied with a slight waiver in his voice. I quirked a brow at him questioningly. “Trust me,” he said, rolling his eyes. His hand was shaking.</p><p>“Uh huh, you look okay,” I said with a thick layer of sarcasm. </p><p>Gerard started nodding, which quickly turned to fervent head shaking.</p><p>“Nope, no. I’m not okay, I’m not o-fucking-kay, please get me off this staircase,” he started pleading, clenching his eyes shut.</p><p>
  <i>Okay, shit, I wasn’t expecting that. </i>
</p><p>I started down the stairs toward him and began to extend my hand but stopped before I could touch his shoulder. </p><p>“What, uh, what’s wrong?” I asked softly.</p><p>“I, uh… I’m sorry, it doesn’t make sense,” he said.</p><p>“Hm, well, this time two years ago, I was finishing 5th grade at a muggle Catholic school and then my mother was telling me that witches and wizards and fucking dragons are real, so… I’ve kind of learned that shit not making sense is normal. Try me,” I said, taking a seat and patting the step next to me. </p><p>To my surprise, he sat down. </p><p>“I hate feeling confined. Like, like I can’t go anywhere or get out of a situation. Like right now,” he said.</p><p>“That makes perfect sense,” I replied. For the first time since getting stuck here, he looked me in the eyes. </p><p>God, he had pretty eyes. </p><p>“What?”</p><p>
  <i>Fuck, I said that out loud, fuckfuckfuck-</i>
</p><p>“Uh, what  meant- I mean- You just-” fuck, what the hell were words?</p><p>“Thank you.” </p><p>“Huh?”</p><p>Gerard was smiling, softly, at the ground, his black bangs falling over his eye.</p><p>“That’s the first compliment I’ve received in… a long time,” he said. I felt my jaw drop.</p><p>“What the fuck?” He looked at me in surprise. </p><p>“You should be receiving compliments, like, every day? I mean, seriously, you’re good at potions and Defense Against the Dark Arts - don’t think I don’t know, Ray gushed over you, you saved his ass in that class - and anyway you’re not hard on the eyes. Like, at all,” I finished.</p><p>Gerard was making a face that I couldn’t read: some mix of bashful and confused and upset.</p><p>And then the staircase moved. </p><p>Then, Gerard was bolting away, and I was alone feeling stupid. Again.</p><p>***</p><p>
  <b>Gerard</b>
</p><p>Summer passed without much commotion and sixth year was starting before I knew it. I had a new goal for the year: avoid Frank Iero at all costs.</p><p>Our conversation on the stairs last year was burned into my head and, everytime I replayed it, it gave me a funny feeling in my chest. </p><p>Andy was milling around our dorm room, unpacking and humming to himself. I was happy to have him for a roommate. He was quiet and a little terrifying (seriously, he was fifteen and he already had a tattoo) but he didn’t treat me like a freak. He and that one Gryffindor 4th year (Joe?) were actually kind of nice to me. </p><p><i>Y’know who else is nice? Frank Iero</i>, my mind supplied, unhelpfully.</p><p> <i>Oh, FUCK no. </i></p><p>***</p><p>
  <b>~ Year 3 ~</b>
</p><p>
  <b>Frank</b>
</p><p>Third year was trying me already. </p><p>Gerard's hair was getting longer, down to his shoulders, and it only served to make him hotter. Apparently, though, I had done something to upset him because he had gone from generally ignoring me to flat out avoiding me. He moved desks as soon as I sat down in potions class.</p><p>I thought back to our conversation before the summer, the one on the stairs. He had seemed happy with me for a moment. </p><p>What went wrong?</p><p>***</p><p>
  <b>Ray</b>
</p><p>"Why do you care so much about being Gerard's friend?" </p><p>Frank was sitting next to me on the grass, soaking up the last of the summer's warmth. Autumn was setting in and I was beginning to run out of time until… </p><p>
  <i>I should really tell him. He could help me. </i>
</p><p>I shook my head to clear that thought away. It still wasn't the right time.</p><p>"I don't know," Frank said, his face burning red. <i>Oh. That explains it. </i></p><p>I raised my eyebrows at him. "You sure about that?" </p><p>Frank flopped onto his back and yelled at the sky in frustration. I could only laugh.</p><p>***</p><p>
  <b>Gerard</b>
</p><p>My attempts to avoid Frank, apparently, only inspired him to pursue me. </p><p>Why was he doing this? Why was he so intent on being friends with me? I didn't like him. I made that painfully obvious. </p><p>And yet- </p><p>He tried so hard. </p><p>If I spilled ink, he was the first to help me clean up. If I was out of parchment, he was the first to offer me some. </p><p>But this was on a new level.</p><p>Mikey stormed up to me with a parcel in his hand. It was obvious from the poorly taped, black wrapping paper and illegible writing that it was from Frank. </p><p>
  <i>What in Merlin's beard-</i>
</p><p>"That <i>fool</i> Frank Iero actually had the <i>gaul</i> to hide this in my bookbag, so here you go, <i>Gerard</i>," Mikey said, venomously, throwing the package on the table before me. "I don't know what you did to make him more annoying than he was before, but, please, undo it because he is so far out of line, I mean who does he think he is and how did he even…"</p><p>I tuned Mikey out in favor of tearing the paper off and finding a small, thick, black notebook with a slip of parchment on top. </p><p>'Gerard, </p><p>I saw that you dropped your old notebook in a cauldron last week. Thought you could use a new one. </p><p>I'm sorry.</p><p>Happy belated birthday.</p><p>-Frank'</p><p>I couldn't help it. I smiled so hard I thought my face would break.</p><p>
  <i>Fuck avoiding him. </i>
</p><p>*** </p><p>
  <b>Frank</b>
</p><p>The platform at Hogsmeade was warm and golden lit as I prepared to board the Hogwarts express. Another year in the books, another train ride, another flight home to mom and Jersey. </p><p>"Frank!" I heard someone shouting behind me. </p><p>I couldn't believe my eyes.</p><p>Gerard Way was running toward me, full speed, with his brother glaring furiously from a ways behind. </p><p>"Uh, hi, Gerard," I said as the panting boy caught up to me.</p><p>"You- I didn't catch you after- after exams but-" he paused to take a deep breath "- thank you." Out of his bag, he produced the little black notebook I had, very stealthily, dropped into his brother's bag a week ago.</p><p>"This- this is really kind of you," he said with eyes trained on the ground. I didn't know how to respond. He hadn't so much as breathed in my direction for a whole year, despite my efforts and now-</p><p>"Could I join you for the ride back?" </p><p>
  <i>What. The. Fuck. </i>
</p><p>"I-" he looked up at me with wide, hazel eyes, scared like I was about to say no.</p><p>"Of course."</p><p>He smiled.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p><b>Ashes</b>: so how confused are y'all now?<br/><b>Gems</b>: We weren’t quite sure to to pull it off so it might get edited in the future, comment anything that you're confused/curious about and we’ll answer them, and thanks for all the support, the comments are so sweet, please leave a comment and kudo if you’re enjoying it so far ^-^<br/><b>Ashes</b>: ***SHAMELESS PLUG TIME**** Follow Gems on IG @so_long_and_carry_on STAY SAFE LOVE Y’ALL BYEEEE</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Baby Seasons Change But People Don't</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <b>Patrick</b>
</p><p>Fourth year was testing my patience already because, as sure a bowtruckle to a doxy’s nest, Peter Lewis Kingston Wentz III was sitting next to me at breakfast, as if it were no big deal and we were actually <i>friends</i>. </p><p>"What the actual fuck are you doing Peter?" I said, dryly, over my bowl of porridge, not lifting my eyes from the book I was reading. It was my new herbology textbook, and I intended to have skimmed at least the first chapter before going off to class. </p><p>"Just eatin' some toast," he said with an infuriating smirk that I didn't even need to see in order to know it was there, "whatcha readin' Patty?" </p><p>Oh no. <i>That</i> was unacceptable. </p><p>"My <i>name</i> is Patrick, as you well know, <i>Peter</i>, you will address me as such," I seethed, lifting my eyes to shoot daggers at the boy.</p><p>The summer had done him well, much as I hated to admit it. His skin was tanner, eyes warmer, and he had the faintest highlights in his dark hair. It pained me, but Pete was devastatingly handsome. </p><p><i>Too bad his personality can't match his face</i>, I thought. </p><p>Ever since that fateful (dreaded) Quidditch match during first year, the older boy had been, for lack of a better word, obsessed with me. I didn’t suppose I would ever forget the feeling of a bludger crushing my phalanges. Or the sensation of them growing back over night... Somehow, over a five minute walk to the infirmary, which was only warranted <i>because</i> of Pete’s inability to aim, the boy had decided that I was "precious" and that he wanted to be my best friend. Needless to say, I wasn't a fan of the idea but that didn't matter. When Pete Wentz wanted something, he did not give up. Ever. He was relentless… and borderline stalkerish.... Last year, he went as far as sneaking into the Slytherin common room (Merlin knows how he did it) on my birthday,  where he waited for me before attacking me with confetti upon entry. Frank had to haul him out, unconscious, after I <i>stupefied</i> him. </p><p>My overall disdain for Pete only grew, though, when I learned of his lineage. The Wentz family was well known in the wizarding community and there was plenty to hear when it came to their infamous son. Pete was a party monster and well known for trashing half of Hogwarts' rules while never actually getting expelled.</p><p><i>The perks of a famous, pureblood name</i>, I supposed. Special treatment could kiss my muggleborn ass.</p><p>Why he was so obsessed with being my friend, I had no clue. But for the boy who got everything he wanted to have a taste of denial? Well, I certainly enjoyed giving him a taste of how the other half lives. I wasn’t about to befriend someone based on status alone and his privileged, pureblood expectations could suck it. Who was he to call me precious anyway? He was barely an inch taller than me...</p><p><i>I don't care if I'm 5'4, I can still hex his ass into the next dimension</i>, I reminded myself. </p><p>"But 'Patty' is so fitting! It's as cute as you," he said and he even had the audacity to wink. </p><p>Slamming my book shut, I rose from the table and snatched up my bag. </p><p>"<i>Flippendo</i>," I gave a sharp flick of my wand and Pete was off of his chair and onto his back. </p><p>Smirking, I stepped over him and headed off to my first class. </p><p>~°~</p><p>
  <b>Frank</b>
</p><p>It was the first day of class and I was already running late. </p><p>It wasn’t my fault that I had passed out at breakfast, though. </p><p>It was Gerard’s; Gerard and his new fucking hair.</p><p>It was <i>red</i>. And not just any red: fire engine red, which only served to make his porcelain skin look even more striking and his hazel eyes even greener and, yeah he had filed out a little over the summer and taken to wearing his sleeves rolled up to the elbows, which showed off his <i>forearms</i>-</p><p><i>Fuck</i>. </p><p>Let’s just say, I had had a busy night... in bed... with a silencing charm…</p><p>So really, Gerard was to blame. And maybe Ryan for not waking me up when I fell asleep on my damn toast. </p><p>Sprinting, I made it to the greenhouse with seconds to spare. I quickly took my seat next to Patrick, who had no doubt been there ten minutes early, and was already reviewing the new textbook. </p><p>“So, I saw one Pete Wentz turtle style in the Great Hall this morning…”</p><p>Patrick pouted and glared harder at his book. “You notice him before or after you passed out?”</p><p><i>Sass-trick is back, evidently</i>. I rolled my eyes with a laugh. “Before. What did he do this time?”</p><p>“... He called me ‘Patty’,” Patrick replied under his breath. I couldn’t help but laugh. </p><p>“That all?”</p><p>Patrick gave me an incredulous look.</p><p>“<i>All?</i> Excuse me, that is an offense of the highest degree, to disgrace one’s name in such a manner, I mean, honestly, who does he think he is-”</p><p>“One of the most famous pureblood teens in the wizarding world,” I interjected.</p><p>“-<i>and that’s another thing!</i> Why does his bloodline have to make him so special? He’s moronic and disrespectful and-”</p><p>Patrick’s rant was cut short by the entrance of Professor Longbottom. Internally, I was grateful; Patrick was hard to stop once you got him going on the topic of class inequality and pureblood politics. I agreed, to an extent. Most purebloods were royal assholes.</p><p><i>Most…</i> </p><p>Not him. Not Gerard. Gerard was perfect.</p><p>His brother, on the other hand, was the embodiment of a pureblood asshole and had only gotten more and more… irritable. Since day one, Mikey Way had worn his disdain for the lower class of wizards, and me, on his sleeve. Flaunted his popularity and status shamelessly, and he had seemingly made it his mission to let me know I was <i> nothing</i> in comparison. He had everything: he was top of his class, attractive, with money and a pedigree bloodline to top it all off. </p><p>And none of that mattered. </p><p>How could it when Gerard was there in all his shy, sweet, fucking <i>attractive</i> glory? </p><p>
  <i>Get a grip, Iero... </i>
</p><p>After spending the train ride together at the end of last term, I felt so much closer to Gerard. Just sharing space with him while he doodled in his sketchbook felt good. While most of the trip had been spent in uncomfortable silence with Mikey glaring daggers at me from the carriage across the way, Gerard had been surprisingly eager to share his plans of creating moving comics. I had learned that Gerard had dreams of becoming a comic book artist but for the wizarding world exclusively, since apparently, there weren’t any already. I told him he was talented. He turned a hundred shades of red.</p><p>He was so <i>cute</i>. </p><p>“-Iero? Mr. Iero?”</p><p>I snapped my head up to see Professor Longbottom looking at me expectantly. </p><p>“Are you with us Mr. Iero or are we still on summer holiday?”</p><p>“Sorry, Professor, must’ve left my brain back in Jersey,” I said smoothly, earning a few giggles from the class. I could feel my ears burning. </p><p>“Well, be sure to have it sent this way immediately, the school year isn’t waiting for you. Now, would you kindly turn to page 394 and begin reading?”</p><p>“Yes, sir,” I said.</p><p>Yeah. Fourth year was going to be a challenge. I could tell, already.</p><p>
  <i>And it’s only just begun…</i>
</p><p>~*~</p><p>
  <b>Tyler</b>
</p><p>“No way, you should keep it red,” I said, toying with the stringy crimson strands on Josh’s head.</p><p>“But Tyyyy,” he whined, “I’m bored y’know? I think blonde will look good.” I rolled my eyes, jostling my legs and, therefore, the boy on my lap. Josh squealed a bit and latched onto my shoulder.</p><p>“Ty! Don’t drop me,” he spluttered, laughing. We were perched up on the stone wall, looking out over the lawn where students were meandering about in their free time. Josh was situated sideways on my lap with his arms looped around my shoulders.</p><p>“Ty, I won't do it if you think it’ll look ugly,” Josh finally said with a pout. I rolled my eyes.</p><p>“C’mon, Josh, you know I'd never find you ugly,” I said. His face lit up, immediately.</p><p>“You mean that?” Giggling, I nodded.</p><p>“Yay! I’ll grill Gerard about it later, try and get those secrets out of him. He got his hair that kick ass red color, so I'm sure he can help.”</p><p>“You mean the ‘awesome red color’ you’re currently sporting?” Josh glared at me and I busted up again. His glares were too cute to be taken seriously. </p><p>“You just gave me your hair blessing! No take backs! I am coloring my hair blonde with the help of the hair master Gerard!” </p><p>“Since when is Gerard Way the hair master?” I giggled</p><p>“Since always,” he replied. I raised my eyebrows. “What?” he cocked his head in confusion.</p><p>“Teal roots.” </p><p>He gawked at me, placing his hand on his heart in a mockery of offence. “Those were a masterpiece, be quiet Tyler.” </p><p>“They were a mistake!”</p><p>“A <i>masterpiece</i>.” I shook my head and buried my face into Josh’s neck, winding my arms around his middle. </p><p>It always felt good to be back with Josh.</p><p>Even if we had spent the whole summer together.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p><b>Ashes</b>: HELLO EVERYONE DID YOU MISS US, I'M BACK WITH ALL THE GAY<br/><b>Gems</b>: Sorry for the long ass break between chapters, lifes been super crazy lately, but we’ll try to get the next chapter out in the next couple days to make up for it &lt;3<br/><b>Ashes</b>: yeah life has been a little rough on my end and I apologize cuz depression = no motivation to write hahaha… but i promise I'm alright and back into it now &lt;3<br/><b>Gems</b>: Yeah Ashes needs a lot of love rn cause she’s a bean ^-^, anyway enjoy this gay trifecta and leave a kudo and a comment<br/><b>Ashes</b>: yes they make our day :) love you guys and see you next chapter!<br/><b>Gems</b>: It’s gonna be soon dw! Love y'all</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Everything Sucks and I Hate Everyone: An Autobiography by Mikey Way</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <b>Mikey</b>
</p><p>Fuck Frank Iero.</p><p>I was currently situated at the table behind him in the common room, the black mahogany suiting my mood quite nicely.  He was currently rolling around, feet up, on one of the regal leather lounges laughing like a lunatic. As if it <i>wasn’t</i> worth more than his entire house. That blonde kid, Patrick I think? at least had the decency to look embarrassed. But Iero? </p><p>Oh no, he was <i>never</i> any form of decent. Never self aware, never thought out, never <i>anything</i>. </p><p>I scribbled hard with my quill, a first year caught my eye before scampering away with a yelp, the younger Slytherins knew better than to mess with me when I was in one of my moods. It had only been a day since we came back and he was already pissing me off. The last 4 years have been a nightmare. Not only was he showing me up in several of my classes, as well as on the quidditch pitch, but he was completely outside of my sphere of influence. It was like he was fucking immune to me. Like he didn’t even give a shit about who I was. Everyone else knew to treat me, everyone else would know better than to dare challenge me. But not him, the insufferable mudblood.</p><p>The sheer disrespect made my blood boil.</p><p>“Woah Mikey, you good?” I was brought out of my brooding by Ludlow nervously tapping my shoulder. I flashed him a glare, and he shrunk back slightly. I smirked a little, at least I had control over <i>some</i> people. Though my smirk soon faltered as he nervously motioned to the potions essay I had been slumped over for the past hour. I followed his gaze only to realise I’d been squeezing my quill so tightly ink had exploded out the end. It was completely ruined.</p><p>“Fucking Iero!” I seethed. The idiot in question glanced over at me in confusion for a moment, before rolling his eyes and returning to whatever innate story he was telling. Ludlow started blabbering about how we could get the stain out, that it was going to be ‘all alright’, like I was some toddler in the midst of a melt down. But for once I was too angry to panic about whether or not he was patronising me. Even without trying that frog brained idiot Iero was fucking me over. </p><p>And on top of all that, he had taken it to the next level by pursuing some sort of ‘connection’ with my brother. I imagine he took great pleasure in rubbing it in my face.  I had been silently beside myself when Gerard had asked me to sit in a separate carriage at the end of last term. He-</p><p>“Don’t get mad but…” Ludlow drew me out of my thoughts with a sheepish stammer, looking up at me terrified. </p><p>I had been completely ignoring my friend's attempts to frantically vanish the ink from the page only to realise too late he had actually just vanished my nearly complete assessment in its entirety.</p><p>“FUCK!” I exploded, slamming my fist down on the table, setting our ink bottles rattling. The whole room went silent, I immediately shrunk back as everyone turned to look at me, their faces shimmering under the watery light of the lake overhead.</p><p>I tried my best to look casual, plastering on a completely unconvincing smile, even though inside I was ready to rampage “Uh sorry everyone, this potions essay is a real bitch,” I chuckled, “Show’s over now.” Most people seemed convinced, though Frank’s expression told me he didn't buy it for a second. I squinted at him, my lips naturally curled up into a sneer.</p><p>His proficiency for reading through people’s bullshit just pissed me off more.</p><p>I’d been having more and more moments like this over the years, feeling like a ticking time bomb ready to go off on anyone who pushed me. Sure you could just say it’s puberty, but I would argue it was the fault of a certain couple thick-headed stimuli. Don’t even get my started on Toro. I ground my teeth together in frustration.</p><p><i>I need to get out of here before I end up strangling someone</i>, I thought darkly. </p><p>I stood up from my seat, cringing as it screeched loudly against the cobbled floor. “Mikey?” Ludlow questioned.</p><p>“I’ve gotta pick something up, just don’t wait up for me” I muttered back, already making my way across the watery lit common room.</p><p>I was in such a hurry to get the hell out of there, that I didn’t even notice the cloaked figure bent over right outside the door until I nearly somersaulted over it.</p><p>“What the fuck?” I hissed, holding onto the last of my fleeting composure.</p><p>The stranger stumbled back, stepping onto their own robes and falling flat on their ass. As they groaned I got a better look at them in the flickering torchlight. He was... familiar, though I couldn’t quite place him at that moment. </p><p>He had a thick head of short black hair, nicely styled. He was… well, handsome, I guess would be the best descriptor, classically so in fact. Why the hell hadn’t I seen him around before, I swear I knew him from somewhere...</p><p>“Oh shit, sorry Mikey” Said an annoying familiar voice</p><p>“<i>Wentz</i>?!” I gasped in reproach pulling a face, I took a step back, I felt violated. </p><p>“Uh yea?” He arched an eyebrow at me quizzically, and I immediately recognised the cocky bastard. </p><p>He’d definitely filled out a little over the summer, muscles clearly present and accounted for pressed tight against his robes. He’d tanned a bit too, and was that a tattoo I caught on his stomach? I wonder how far it- I shook the thoughts away, an unpleasant shudder went down spine, <i>What the fuck was that about??</i></p><p>“Sorry they changed the password on me” He said sheepishly, absentmindedly scratching the back of his head. He now lay laxly on the ground as though he’d really planned on ending up there all along.</p><p>“They have a tendency to do that,” I snapped, “you know, to keep people from other houses <i>out</i>.” </p><p>“Now why would they wanna do a thing like that?” I would almost believe he was being suave, if not for the genuinely dumbfounded expression on his face. </p><p>I think his stupidity was going to make me throttle him, so I took the healthier alternative and stalked off down the dim dingy corridor.</p><p>“Wait Mikes! At least give me the password man!” His voice echoed across the stone work but I ignored him, still a little taken aback by the path my thoughts were heading. </p><p>“Mikey? Yo Mikes!” I heard his echo fade as I turned a corner, replaced by the louder ambient noises of the lower floors. What an idiot.</p><p>~°~</p><p>I slipped through the darkened treeline of the forbidden forest wordlessly until I came upon the rocky shores of a large pond, more of a mini lake, great ancient oaks stretching up all around me. I let out an angry sigh. I always ended up here subconsciously when I was angry. It was always a reliable place to vent out my frustration or to just cool off without the threat of wandering eyes. It’s waters lapped monotonously across the pebbles at my feet. But this also meant it became the home of so many <i>awful</i> memories that usually just fed into my emotions more. I slumped amongst the tangled roots of an ancient cedar and hissed.</p><p>I had become quite proficient in attack spells since- …. since ... I last had need of them, joining a dueling league shortly after my second year (much to my parents approval). I would never be caught unprepared again.</p><p>‘<i>I bet Frank would have known what to do back then. Gerard too for that matter.</i>’ A vicious little voice whispered in the back of my head.</p><p>Attack spells also acted as a great way to let off steam. I looked around the clearing for my target, soon spotting a small mossy boulder submerged deep within the pond, the midday sun dancing across its surface.</p><p>I sat up and took a deep breath, rolling my head across my shoulders in preparation. “Wingardium Leviosa!” I called out, flicking my wand at the boulder. As if with great effort the old rock rose stiffly into the air, water streaming from it as it went. With a vicious slash to the right I sent the boulder flying into one of the ancient trees with a tremendous crash. It seemed to reverberate across the forest, sending a swoop of swallows flying from amongst the trees. </p><p>But it didn’t break. At most it made the tree creak, I noticed with annoyance.</p><p><i>I bet Frank could have already broken it</i>. I My mind taunted</p><p>It just made my blood boil more, bringing back all the raging thoughts at full force. Where did that bastard get off? Not just making a fool of me in class, but fucking with my brother too? I felt my hand tighten on my wand. <i>He was probably just using him to get in with the purebloods, so he could pretend he to be one of us</i>. I thought. I hissed out a breath in white hot anger at the notion. </p><p>I didn’t give a fuck what his last name was, he was <i>not</i> one of us, he was repugnant scum like the rest of them. A noxious weed choking at Gerards neck. I was going to expose him for the fraud he was.</p><p>“Can Iero do THIS!”</p><p>I ran a few paces forward skidding right at the water's edge, the brackish mud kicking up onto my robes. I swung my wand around before shouting out:</p><p>“Bombarda!”</p><p>My arm was flung back by the strength of the spell. But even so it still tapered out before it could even get close to the boulder, instead sending a flurry of pine needles flying in all directions.</p><p>“You’ve got to be kidding me, why can’t I fucking do this?!”</p><p>I kicked against the mud in frustration and nearly slipped over. My brother wasn’t the only thing he’d stolen, Toro clung to him for dear life. Oh and that was a whole other can of worms. Even <i>thinking</i> that name filled me up with venom. <i>Ray Toro</i>. I gripped shakily at my wand handle, my nails digging into my palm. The asshole who thinks he can just get away with running away from me. With ignoring me, with leaving me behind-. My breath hitched. I mean no, I shook those thoughts away, refocusing. The most important thing is he hurt Gee, I bit at my lip, I’d seen the scars to prove it, I shuddered at the memory. There was something seriously wrong with him, and I wasn’t going to let it slide. NO ONE knew what he was really capable of except me. I wasn’t going to let anyone else get hurt because of him, he's not getting away with shit.</p><p>I took a shaky step forward, coming right up to the water's edge. I paced myself, taking in a slow breath, a moment of clarity amongst the internal chaos. I steadied my wand arm.</p><p>“Wingardium Leviosa!” I watched the spell connect, slowly sending the boulder teetering into the air as though pulled on strings. I inched it closer and closer until it hovered right over the water's surface, reflection rippling on the surface. I quickly exhaled before, with one fluid motion, I launched the boulder skyward, pushing my all magic into it, trying to get a couple more seconds air time, before finally letting it go. I squinted up at it, lifting up my hand against the sun. I saw it get smaller as it soared, and then gradually bigger again as it arched back towards me.</p><p>I whipped my wand around me with as much velocity as I can handle.</p><p>“Oppugno!” I screamed out, pointing my wand skyward at the boulder. The water bubbled for a second before suddenly, PEW! A sound like a gunshot popped as a stone from the lakebed riquiched up out of the water, followed by another, and another. </p><p>Pretty soon the pond's surface was a torrent, the entire lake bed ripped like bullets up towards the boulder, hitting it with rapid precision in one constant spot with a loud crack as they exploded off it, raining debris down around me. As the boulder got closer and closer to the ground I grit my teeth, willing the rocks to hit their target. </p><p>The boulder fell closer, and closer, and CLOSER, I squinted my eyes tight shut and braced, it’s not gonna break, it’s not gonna break, It’s not- </p><p>CRACK</p><p>I cracked my eyes open when a thunderous crash from above shook me out of my thoughts and forced me to look. The boulder was split jaggedly in half only a few feet from the water's surface. I let out a shaky breath I didn’t realise I was holding, a lopsided grin finding its way onto my face. </p><p>I did it.</p><p>The halves came down like two mini comets, touching down right into the middle of the pond, sending up a giant tidal wave of icy water in its wake. I didn't have time to retreat before it splashed up all over my robes. I let out a gasp as the cold water splashed up all over my face and splattered onto my glasses. It felt like a whole system reset. I panted for a minute, shivering, but even the water that seeped into my robes couldn’t dampen the mounting determination that pumped through my veins. I was still fucking capable, I could still hold my own. I took a confident step forward, looking at my work prodding out of the pond. I’m not the weak little second year I once was, I’m Mikey <i>Fucking</i> Way, and I’ve had enough of bidding my time and waiting around.</p><p>Iero is going to learn his fucking place, and Ray, well, his penance has been a long time coming, and it’s about time it was served. With a flick of my wand my clothes mostly dried out, I popped it roughly back into my pocket and headed back up towards the castle with a newly stoked fire in me. I smirked.</p><p>This was going to be <i>my</i> fucking year.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p><b>Gems</b>: Mikey’s ready to fuck some shit up,<br/><b>Ashes</b>: HOOOOOO BOI MIKEY THE BOSS BITCH WAY HAS ENTERED THE CHAT<br/><b>Gems</b>: Things are about to pick up, Frank and Ray better watch themselves haha<br/><b>Ashes</b>: Hold onto your hats, folks, it's gonna be a bumpy ride<br/><b>Gems</b>: So leave a kudo and a comment, we love em’<br/><b>Ashes</b>: See you next chapter, STAY SAFE!!!!!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Denial is Not Just a River in Egypt</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <b>Gerard</b>
</p><p>History of Magic had to be my least favorite subject. It’s only redeeming quality was that it was taught by a literal ghost (and Professor Binns was a really cool guy), other than that, it was a drag. Having it first thing in the morning did nothing to curb the urge to fall asleep while the teacher droned. Discreetly, I pulled out my sketchbook - <i>the one Frankie gave you</i>, my mind piped up - and started in on a new sketch. I refused to revisit any of the drawings I had stayed up doing last night because -  <i>no don’t even go there</i>, I yelled internally. </p><p>“Do you have any clue what he’s talking about?” I didn’t bother to look up at the person talking to me; the only person who ever sat next to me in class was Andy. Well, Andy and Frank - <i>NO, STOP THINKING ABOUT FRANK!</i> </p><p>“Nope,” I replied with a spectacular voice crack, “no clue.” </p><p>“Cool drawing, that Frank?”</p><p><i>Fuck</i>. </p><p>Before I even knew what I was doing, my hands were tearing the page from the book and violently crumpling it up. By the time I was done murdering the half formed sketch, several eyes had turned to me (thankfully, Professor Binns was still droning, unaware, at the front of the room). My ears flamed and I ducked my head.</p><p>“Dude. I was complimenting it,” Andy said, shocked at my display of unprecedented rage. </p><p>“I didn’t like it much. That’s all,” I muttered, sheepishly. </p><p>“Sure, you didn’t.” </p><p>My face burned even more. </p><p>~*~</p><p>My next class of the day was potions and, honestly, I was dreading it. Because potions class meant - </p><p>“Gerard!” </p><p><i>Speak of the devil…</i> </p><p>Now, I had caught a glimpse of Frank the previous night at the feast in the Great Hall, but no, no, i was not mentally prepared for him to be this close to me. Somehow, Frank managed to get more attractive every year and it was driving me crazy. Sure, I had gone out on a limb of impulsivity and dyed my hair fire truck red (it wasn’t supposed to be that bright, but the spell hadn’t gone quite to plan), but Frank had decided to take all of his shoulder length raven hair and buzz it right off. He looked like a fucking first year again, and i was ashamed at how attractive i found it. </p><p>I blushed and ducked my head again. </p><p>“How was your summer?” Frank asked sweetly, sitting next to me. </p><p>
  <i>My summer? Oh God…</i>
</p><p>“It was fine,” I lied. My summer had been far from fine. </p><p>“Y’know, we both live in Jersey! We should try to get together on breaks sometime!” </p><p>He sounded so excited, so happy, why, why did this have to happen why me-</p><p>
  <i>“You sick creature, how dare you! How did I wind up with such a mess of a son?”</i>
</p><p>I shook my head trying to clear the memory of my father screaming. </p><p>I kept telling myself it didn’t matter. That his opinion did not mean a thing to me and that it was okay, that i could like Frank -</p><p>Except i still couldn’t like him. I couldn’t like anyone. Because no one could like me, i was too big of a mess -</p><p>“Gee?” I glanced over at the voice that had torn me out of my thoughts. </p><p>“You alright?” I gave a stilted nod. Frank’s mouth twisted into a small frown but he dropped it in favor of starting his potion. </p><p>No, it didn’t matter if I liked Frank Iero. All that mattered was getting through this year and moving on with my life. </p><p>~*~</p><p>Ray</p><p>All that matter was getting through this year and getting out of here. My seventh year was finally starting which meant I just had to survive until May and then I was free. Free of Gerard, of Frank, of… well, anyone I cared about who I could possibly hurt. </p><p>Speaking of Frank, the boy was currently sitting across from me at lunch making heart eyes at - drumroll, please - Gerard Way. </p><p>“Seriously when are you gonna go talk to him?”</p><p>“When are <i>you</i>?” Frank shot back. It was a low blow, since he knew I was on odd footing with the Way brothers - <i>though not</i> why- but i let it slide. His face was so red, it must’ve been physically painful. </p><p>“I sat with him in potions this morning,” Frank mentioned, picking at his sandwich. I gave a small nod in reply and continued on my soup. “He seemed… tense. I guess he had a bad summer.” I snorted at that.</p><p>“Every summer is a bad summer for him. His parents are assholes.” Frank’s eyes widened. </p><p>
  <i>Oh, shit you definitely said too much, that was NOT your place-</i>
</p><p>“What do you mean? Do they hurt him? Is he okay? I live in jersey too, maybe he could stay with me-”</p><p>“Frank,'' I interrupted, “Please don't say anything to gerard. It’s not on me to explain his personal life. Okay?” The boy gave a solemn nod and glanced longingly back up the table at the Ravenclaw. </p><p>“You're hopeless,” I chuckled. Frank Stuck his tongue out at me.</p><p><i>The real hopeless one is you, you idiot</i>, I reminded myself. It was true. No matter what I tried, or how much he scared me, I was a fool for one Mikey Way.</p><p>And yet, one Mikey Way was also the source of my anxiety this term. Not even two days in, and it felt like he was onto me. Mind you, I had had my fears before. Fears that Mikey knew more than he should, but it never bothered me because he seemed relatively passive. Like even if he knew, he would do anything. But this year… </p><p>He seemed like he was out for blood. </p><p>Our confrontation on the train had left me restless, worried that he was going to expose me, somehow. </p><p>I just had to be careful. More so than usual… </p><p>I just had to get through one more year.</p><p>Ryan</p><p>
  <i>When the moon fell in love with the sun, all was golden in the sky<br/>All was golden when the day met the night</i>
</p><p>“RYAN!” </p><p>My hand faltered, leaving a streak of stray ink on the parchment. I barely had time to roll up the paper before the source of the shrieking voice was on top of me, hugging me to death.</p><p>“Bren- <i>Bren!</i> Loose up, can’t breathe,” I choked out and the hyperactive boy let go, scooching back on the bench to look me in the eye.</p><p>“How was your summer? How are you? I missed you! Were you writing? Did you miss me? What were you writing? Did I interrupt you? I’m sorry…’ his words kept going a mile a minute and i sighed. He was absolutely endearing. </p><p>“My summer was fine, Bren, how about yours?” He immediately launched into a highly animated reenactment of his holiday adventures, with entirely too many hand gestures. Cautiously, so he wouldn’t notice, I gently unrolled the parchment to see if my ink had been smudged. </p><p><i>No such luck</i>, I thought with a grimace as I noticed the splotchy words. <i>Never mind, I can rewrite later. At least he didn’t notice-</i></p><p>“What’s that you’re writing Ry?” </p><p>
  <i>FUCK. </i>
</p><p>“Nothing!” My voice cracked ten times over two syllables. Fantastic. </p><p>“What! Ryan! No secrets, tell meeeee! Tell me tell me tell me!” Brendon started crawling over me grasping for the parchment like a spoiled child until he was laying in my lap staring up at me. </p><p>
  <i>FUCK why is he so cute…</i>
</p><p>“Please Ryan?” He was giving me such pleading eyes, I almost relented.</p><p>But-</p><p>“Maybe another time. When it's done.” He beamed up at me</p><p>
  <i>Another time, when I’m ready to tell you it's about, well… you.</i>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p><b>Ashes</b>: WELCOME TO DE NILE FRIENDS AND GAYS<br/><b>Gems</b>: Ah yes, it’s truly strong with these ones haha<br/><b>Ashes</b>: As a fun pride month special, we give you another gay trifecta FEATURING RYDEN THIS TIME HOOOO BOI<br/><b>Gems</b>: It's just about to get gayer, leave a kudo and a comment as always we love getting them &lt;3<br/><b>Ashes</b>: Happy Pride and stay safe everyone!!!!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. Fuck the Police, Be Gay, Do Crime</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <b>Pete</b>
</p><p>I wasn’t a person who enjoyed libraries. The few occasions when I was to be found in Hogwarts’ very own, I was usually watching Patrick or attempting to study before doing something to get kicked out (apparently, building a book fort isn't ‘a productive use of school materials’). </p><p>But by chance I found myself there at the same time as one Mikey Way, who was pouring over one of the centre tables with about hundred different ancient tomes, a seemingly permanent pissed off scowl on his face. I largely ignored him, despite my gnawing curiosity. Patrick had sent me to pick up a book, which now that I’m up here, I'm beginning to suspect isn't a real thing. And sure enough upon an outraged scolding from Mrs. Prince after asking for ‘A History of the Nightcore Troll Rave Scene’, I had to face the fact that Patrick had just wanted me out of his face. </p><p>You would think I was used to the rejection, after four years and counting of it, but it still stung like a bitch. Dejected and miserable I caught sight of Mikey again as he grunted down at the book in his hand. </p><p>My relationship with Mikey had been a confusing one. We’d known each other since we were kids. We used to sneak away from the endless monotony of ‘fancy’ American Pureblood Gala’s to make our own fun. Sometimes we’d play pranks on hapless servants and foreign dignitaries alike. And then others we would crawl into dumbwaiters or other hidden dark places away from the rest of the world and tell each other secrets we hadn’t shared with anyone else, that we <i>couldn’t</i> share with anyone else. I smiled fondly at the memory, I was drawn back to the dull present as he scrunched up a parchment into a ball and cast it at a pack of Hufflepuff third years running past on their way down to breakfast. One day it was like a switch had been flicked and he was a different person entirely. </p><p>Cold, dismissive, grey, <i>boring</i>. Like his soul had been snuffed out. Just like all the others.</p><p>Maybe it was my renegade nostalgia, or cat levels of curiosity but couldn’t fight the urge to stick my nose into whatever the hell he was doing. So I leaned over his desk to see the book cover, though upon seeing it I had to stifle a laugh into my elbow. Mikey gave me a judgement charged up and down, “Have you ever even <i>heard</i> of personal space? Or does the concept evade you?”</p><p>I looked down at the book again and snorted, “You know that book’s a joke right?” I nodded over to the novel in his hand. He looked down at it and quickly hugged it to his chest trying to hide it, he returned his glare to me “I'm going to pretend that you have more than one brain cell for five seconds and ask what makes you think that?” Though as he said this he slipped it further down unto his lap. I strolled around the table and held my hand out. He looked at it as though I was a 16th century plague victim and reluctantly turned it over. I flipped over the front cover and squinted through the opening paragraph, with a little ‘aha’ I pointed to a wall of text. Mikey ripped it out of my hands and squinted through it, “Disclaimer, ‘How to tell if your Friend is in a Cult’ is a parody and satire nov- Oh.” His cocky demeanor faltered as he cut himself off. </p><p>I couldn’t keep the smirk off my face. “I think we should re-evaluate which one of us has one brain cell.” Though I was taken aback when instead of biting back he just slumped onto the desk with a sigh. Okay, that was about the last thing I was expecting. I didn’t really know what to do so I quietly sat down next to him. I hesitated for a moment before putting a hand awkwardly on his shoulder “Um... what’s up?”, Mikey turned his head around on the desk to face me, fixing me with a glare with enough venom to make an elephant keel over. I retracted my hand. He held the glare for a second longer before finally gave up with a sigh, he deflated slightly. “I feel like I'm chasing ghosts, Wentz.” </p><p>I looked around to see if anyone was listening and leaned in, “Wait, we talkin’ Ghostbusters?”. The shadow of a smile curled up his lips. “No you idiot,” He sat up, bringing forward a pile of parchments covered in unintelligible scrawls. He flicked through them the scowl returning to his face, “Fuck, I mean I wish I was hunting ghosts, that way I’d actually have some clue of what I’m meant to be looking for.” He muttered, forehead creased up in confusion as he turned a page around, trying to read his own chicken scratch handwriting.</p><p>I wasn’t sure quite what to say, so scooched over and took a look. It looked half mad, scribbles about vampire feeding patterns, mind control, blood cults, and… The 7th year Hufflepuff class schedule? He didn't seem to notice I was practically on his lap, or at least he didn’t react.</p><p>“So, uh, what's this all for anyway?” I tried, he opened his mouth like he was about to go off on me but paused for a moment before he closed it, pulling back in his chair, he looked me up and down almost as if he was examining me.</p><p>“Your boyfriend is friends with Iero, correct?” He asked cautiously</p><p>I threw my hands up in defence, “Woah! Nonono, Patrick isn’t my boyfriend, I mean I <i>wish</i> but-” Mikey cut me off with a wave of the hand.</p><p>“Yes yes whatever, your fuck buddy then,” He drawled, my face went bright red, “Look that part doesn’t matter, what matters is he’s close with Iero, right?”</p><p>I nodded hesitantly, “Yeah why?” Mikey squinted and leaned in, beckoning me closer, I complied, still confused as to what the hell was happening.</p><p>“I, I need someone I can trust,” He deadpanned. “Someone with connections, you know, a second opinion on my ‘work’.” He rubbed the back of his head sheepishly staring down at his knees, “And while I obviously have a plethora of friends, not too many rate very highly on the loyalty factor.” He returned his gaze up to me, soft hopeful eyes, two adjectives I would rarely use to describe him anymore. “But you make the cut.” He squared himself up a bit, taking on more of a professional persona and held out a hand.</p><p>“Can you keep a secret Wentz?”</p><p>
  <b>Mikey</b>
</p><p>Everything had been going decent, well as decent as being flung off a metaphorical waterfall without a paddle could go. Though after the incident with Wentz earlier that week I at least had someone else to bounce ideas off.</p><p> He had been surprisingly helpful, coming up with a few sizable theories of his own that we were supposed to be researching for later that day. We might get lucky and catch Ray sneaking off to some cult meeting after charms. Wentz suggests that I just confront the boy, <i>’keep everything out in the open’</i>, which might not be a half bad idea. Maybe I could scare something out of him.</p><p>Though this whole thing was, however, taking a toll on my other aspects of my life. I got merely an ‘Exceeds Expectations’ on my last charms pop test, and Slytherin’s quidditch performance had been <i>embarrassing</i> this season, it didn’t help that I had my attention divided between Iero and the Snitch every match.</p><p>But receiving a letter from Father reprimanding me for not keeping my big brother in line was really the cherry on top of my week. As luck would have it, being the perfect son still didn’t save you from a good verbal lashing.</p><p>And this letter was a doozy…</p><p>I needed to warn Gerard quickly. Father didn’t write to him ever, but his orders were plain and Gee needed to be informed. With that in mind, I set down my usual trek to sneak into Ravenclaw tower. </p><p>I wasn’t sure what I was expecting to find upon entering my brother’s dorm room, but two random boys (one of which was wearing Gee’s paint tarp around his neck) was not high on the list. Normally, I just found Gerard huddled in bed with a sketch or some American comic book, which i would tease him for until i stole it for my own reading. He didn’t need to know that part though.</p><p>Instead, I was surprised to see Gee hovering over Tarp Boy with his wand poised above his head. </p><p>“What the actual fuck?” </p><p>All three of them jumped at the sound of my voice and, I admit, it was slightly satisfying to see the terror in the other unknown boy’s eyes. </p><p>“Mikey! What are you doing here? I didn’t know you were dropping in,” Gerard babbled.</p><p>“Oh, hey Mikey!” Tarp Boy was addressing me as though we were friends. I felt my face flatten into a deadpan expression.</p><p>“Do i know you?” Both boys’ faces fell slightly.</p><p>“Oh, yeah, uh, we’re in the same year? I’m Josh, and this is Tyler,” Tarp Boy - Josh - explained. </p><p>“I see,” I replied with utter disinterest. I truly couldn’t recall ever interacting with these boys. <i>Probably muggleborn rats. </i></p><p>“Tyler, is in my house so we see each other quite a lot,” Gee piped up, fixing me with his best Don’t-Be-An-Ass Glare. I rolled my eyes in response.</p><p>“Anyway, I just popped by to let you know that Father sent a letter and it pertains to you and the family ball at the end of the year.”</p><p>Gerard visibly tightened everywhere. </p><p>“Isn’t that not til June?” he gritted out. I nodded.</p><p>“Don’t worry about it,” I said, hoping to calm him. I hadn’t shown up with the intent to give him a panic attack and discussing the inner workings of our family before two mudblood strangers wasn’t my goal. I watched as his shoulders relaxed, slightly.</p><p>“”Kay, Mikes. Later,” he said.</p><p>“Well, in that case I'll leave you to,” I took in the scenario, once more, “whatever you’re doing.” As I shut the door behind me, I briefly considered the number of unsightly things that could happen with Gerard and his wand pointed at another human’s head.</p><p><i>Should I turn back? </i> I paused for a moment, contemplating. I supposed everything would be okay. More or less.</p><p><i>What could go wrong, really? </i> Actually, the answer was a lot of things. </p><p>But then, I didn't really care. </p><p>
  <b>Frank</b>
</p><p>Charms was whooping my ass. This wasn't anything new, necessarily; charms always whooped my ass. But at the moment, I was failing so hard that wrangling blast-ended skrewts sounded better than practicing this bullshit.</p><p>"Seriously, I don’t know what the fuck I'm doing wrong, I can’t, this is it, I am a failure as a wizard," I lamented to Ray, who was calm as ever and sitting by me on the lawn. It was late September now, and the autumn chill was really setting in. </p><p>"Your elocution is fine, but you keep flailing your wand like it's a bludger bat. Try to adopt a little more grace," he said with a chuckle. </p><p>His sassing aside, I was glad to see him laugh. Ray had been… tense, to say the least, over the past few days. With his new advice, I tried the spell one more time.</p><p>“<i>Bombarda! </i>” The small pile of rocks in front of me, which were supposed to blow away from me, instead remained perfectly intact as I was sent flying onto my ass. </p><p>Ray didn’t even look up from his book… </p><p>“You’re doing great, sweetie,” he said in a mocking American accent.</p><p>"FUCK! Ugh that's it, I'm done, just… just-" I flopped onto the grass with a dramatic huff-"wake me up when September ends! For Christ's sake I'm so sick of everything…" </p><p>Throwing my arm over my eyes, I just laid there letting the weight of the whole semester thus far settle on me. Classes were… going. Herbology, charms, and history were all destroying me. Ray was worrying me with his overly distant attitude. Mikey was practically stalking both of us and being even creepier than normal around me within our own house and especially during quidditch. Oh, quidditch… we had lost every match so far this season, even the one against Ravenclaw, and speaking of Ravenclaw: Gerard. Where to begin there…</p><p>If someone had told me that the angelic boy on the train three years ago would turn into my greatest torment, then I would've jumped out the window right then. I don't know what happened, I wasn't sure how or when that fluttery-butterfly-whirling crush morphed into an all-consuming desire to be as close as I possibly could to him, but it had. It snuck its way into my heart in all the cracked little moments, the seconds in potions class when we brushed while reaching for ingredients, the tongue-poking-out faces he made when he was drawing and didn't catch me staring from down the table, the way his laugh sounded when his guard was down enough to let him laugh… </p><p>But he kept throwing me off. It was frustrating me to no end. I just wanted something simple, something good, for once. After all my time closeted in a Catholic school, I wanted a guy who could love me in a place where i was free to love him back. </p><p>Why my heart had to settle on Gerard, who was so obviously unobtainable, I had no clue.</p><p>"Sickle for your thoughts?" Ray's voice broke me from my trance. </p><p>“Just… people, I guess,” I sighed.</p><p>“People being Gerard Way?” <i>Curse Ray and his all-knowing-ness. </i></p><p>“How did you guess?” He laughed and shook his head, sending his wild curls bouncing.</p><p>“Frank, you could not be any less subtle if you walked around with a glowing sign above your head that said, ‘Hopelessly In Love With Gerard Way.’ But I’ll bite anyway. What did he do this time?” Sitting up, I crossed my legs and hunched forward, plucking aimlessly at the withering grass. </p><p>“He just… I can’t figure it out. One minute, he’s talking with me, smiling and normal, and I think ‘hey, I’ve got a shot,’ and the next, he’s running from me like I’m the back end of a hippogriff. I don’t get why I like him. I mean, he’s perfect, if God wanted to give me the perfect man, well, He did it. But the only issue is that no matter what, he doesn’t seem to care about me at all. And I should be able to move the hell on! So why can’t I? Why the hell do I like him?” When I had finished, I felt winded and looked up to see a sad yet knowing smile on Ray’s face. </p><p>“Gee is… Troubled. I’m really not at liberty to say why but just understand that he’s been through a lot and letting people in, especially people he might like in a more-than-friendly way, is really hard for him. But that doesn’t mean give up. When he does let you in, he’s one of the best people you’ll ever know,” Ray said with a faraway look in his eyes. It made me wonder…</p><p>“What happened between you two?”</p><p>Ray’s face hardened and closed off instantaneously. </p><p>“C’mon. We’ll be late for dinner.” And suddenly, he was striding away from me as if I hadn't said anything. </p><p>
  <b>Gerard</b>
</p><p>Mikey snatched me up immediately following dinner, dragging me into a secluded corridor, away from prying eyes and ears. If I weren’t his brother, the probability of him hauling me off to murder me would be a perfectly logical concern. Honestly, he looked ready to kill something.</p><p>“Right, then, straight to it: dad’s pissed at you.” I fought not to roll my eyes.</p><p>“Christ, Mikey, when is he not? Has there been a single moment of my existence when he wasn’t pissed at me?”</p><p>“Well-”</p><p>“Don’t say before my sorting because you know that’s a lie,” I cut him off and he clamped his mouth shut, gazing at the floor. </p><p>We both knew my father had resented me for a lot longer and for far more than my placement in Ravenclaw. </p><p>“Alright, fine, say your piece. What have i done to infuriate him now?”</p><p>There was a heavy pause before-</p><p>“He knows about Frank.” And like that, my blood ran cold. </p><p>“What do you mean?” I tried and failed to keep my voice level. </p><p>“Some snitch started gossiping after seeing you two together on the train last summer and-”</p><p>“And that’s why he was particularly homophobic with me over the break this year. Fan-<i><br/>
fucking</i>-tatsic!” </p><p>“Not like you did anything to help the situation, I told you to pick someone who would attract less attention-”</p><p>“Oh, and what the actual fuck would that accomplish Mikes? Dad’s a homophobe. He’s hated my guts since I was fucking eight and I have stopped giving a fuck about what he’ll do to me so you can take your advice and his plans and shove it-”</p><p>“Gerard,” Mikey hissed with so much venom he was practically speaking parseltongue. I froze completely.</p><p>“Have you ever paused to consider that your actions affect more than just you? Seriously? Because in case you forgot, that seething letter came to <i>me</i>, and detailed how much trouble <i>I</i> would be in if i didn’t keep you on track. So, for my sake <i>and</i> yours, I suggest you do what dad says and keep your rebellion boner for Frank hidden until you’re fully severed from the family,” Mikey said, barely masking the angered tremble in his voice. I took a deep breath.</p><p>“What is dad’s plan?” My voice was flat. I already knew the answer would be shit.</p><p>“Bring a respectable young witch to the ball in June. I’m sure Lindsey wouldn’t mind. The Ballato’s are a good pureblood family and she’s nice enough to understand the situation,” He suggested. Lindsey was one of the chasers on Ravenclaw’s Quidditch team who had, willingly, chosen to partner with me in transfiguration last year. She was leagues better than me, but still exceptionally kind. </p><p>“Yeah, I’m sure she would…” I trailed off, staring at my shoes. The anger was leaving my system leaving behind my usual anxious discomfort. </p><p>“Right,” Mikey spoke, squaring his shoulders, “I’ll be off then.” He turned on his heel and started toward the dungeons.</p><p>“Hey, Mikes?” He paused. </p><p>“What you said about severing myself from the family? Does that include severing myself from you? Would you renounce me, too?” My voice was steely, and I was holding back the urge to cry. When the day came that I walked away from the Way family and everything tied to it, I at least hoped that I wouldn't be walking away from my brother. He was an ass and a stuck-up prick, but still…</p><p>Mikey didn’t reply. He just kept walking down the corridor. </p><p>
  <b>Frank</b>
</p><p>It was well past curfew, well past midnight, well past any hour that Frank Iero should be awake at, but, alas, there I was, wide fucking awake in my dormitory, listening to Patrick sleep mumble (I was very certain I had just heard him say ‘Pete’ but I would tease him for that later). With no promise of sleep in sight, I grew impatient with staring at my green and silver bed canopy and threw off my sheets. </p><p>No special cloaks or maps, just a hoodie, my slip-on Vans that were nearly worn through, and my good old-fashioned New Jersey street smarts. </p><p>“<i>Lumos</i>,” I whispered, watching my wand tip ignite with that pearlescent glow. I weaved around corners and down small side halls, hissing out “<i>nox</i>” every time I heard footsteps nearby, until I was out on the castle lawn, heading toward the treeline.</p><p>I didn’t make a habit of this and I never went far into the forest, for obvious reasons, but walking along the edge, just within the trees was exceptionally calming on nights like these. Nights where my brain just wouldn’t stop whirring… </p><p>
  <i>My charms grade is in the gutter. Ray isn’t well and won’t say why. The quidditch season is sucking and I need to practice more. Ray hasn’t been well for a while and he still won't say why. I have two essays to start on. Mom wrote and I need to reply. There’s a test in potions next week. Mikey Way literally wants me dead. Gerard… doesn’t talk to me now. And I can’t figure out what I did wrong.</i>
</p><p>
  <i>I had to have done something wrong.</i>
</p><p>
  <i>I always do something wrong…</i>
</p><p>
  <i>I need to get over him.</i>
</p><p>
  <i>I can’t.</i>
</p><p>
  <i>But I should.</i>
</p><p>
  <i>But I don't want to. </i>
</p><p>My mind kept buzzing as i paced the forest floor, listening to the sound of hooting owls and distant howling and-</p><p>Someone crying?</p><p>“The fuck?” I muttered to myself, following the faint sound of stifled sobs into a small clearing. A figure in a hoodie sat on a thick, gnarled tree root, hood up and hunched in on themselves. </p><p>“Um,” the figure’s back straightened, immediately, body twisting around, wand out, and-</p><p>“<i>Stupefy! </i>” I was sent flying.</p><p>Head spinning and back throbbing, I wheezed, trying to force the air back into my lungs, just as Gerard Way - <i>speak of the devil</i>… - appeared above me.</p><p>“Frank?” he said, incredulous. I coughed and he knelt down to help me sit up. </p><p>“The fuck are you doing out here?” That slight Jersey drawl was creeping into his voice and it was stupid how much I loved it. </p><p>“Could ask the same of you,” I retorted, looking him square in the face and noticing his red rimmed hazel eyes. “You were crying,” I stated, plainly. He jumped back from me like I'd burned him.</p><p>“What gave you that impression?”</p><p>“I legit just heard sobbing noises and your eyes are red, dude, c’mon, I am not that dumb.”</p><p>Gerard went silent, staring at the ground. </p><p>And, well. Fuck. <i>Fuck it. Fuck the confusion and not knowing where i stand with him, fuck all the hurt and questioning and wanting him so bad i can’t sleep and not knowing if he gives a shit about me or not fuck the mixed signals and the pining-</i></p><p>I lurched forward and hugged him as tight as I could. Every muscle in his body tensed against me but he didn't pull away. </p><p>“W-what are you doing, F-frank?” </p><p>“Hugging you.”</p><p>“Um… why?” </p><p>
  <i>Because I want to be close to you and show you how I feel however I can, I want you to know that I like you and care about you and want you and I want to know if you want me, I want you to hug me back I -</i>
</p><p>“Because you need a hug. I give hugs to people when they’re sad. And you are definitely sad.”</p><p>It was tense for another moment and then…</p><p>Then he hugged back. And it was the best thing I had felt all week. </p><p>We stayed like that for an immeasurable amount of time, just breathing, arms around each other on the forest floor, until Gerard pulled away with fresh tear tracks on his cheeks. He didn’t flinch when I wiped them away.</p><p>“I-”</p><p>“You do not have to tell me anything.” Gerard’s eyes shot up toward mine, wide and sparkling, like I had just whispered some secret of the universe.</p><p>“But you-”</p><p>“Comforting you doesn’t mean you owe me an explanation,” I said, standing up and offering a hand, “it doesn’t mean you owe me anything. I wanted to comfort you. It’s this thing called caring.” He took my hand and I tugged him up, ignoring the fact that he didn’t pull his fingers away immediately. </p><p>“Besides, my hugs are free,” I said, with a dry laugh. I turned around and started back the way I came, and Gerard stayed right at my heels. </p><p>“My dad wants me to get a girlfriend,” Gerard blurted out, breaking the silence as we started up the lawn to the castle.</p><p>“Oh?” I tried to keep the surprised pain out of my voice.</p><p>“He knows I’m gay.”</p><p>“Oh…” It occurred to me, then, that this was the first time Gerard was admitting his sexuality to me. I paused and turned to look him in the eye. “I’m proud of you. Thank you for telling me that.” His eyes were practically shining, but with happiness instead of tears. “And, uh, same. I’m gay. Also. In case you didn’t know…” I trailed off and flipped back around to keep walking. </p><p>“I, uh, figured,” Gerard replied with a smile in his voice, skipping a step forward to walk right next to me. He even went as far as brushing our shoulders.</p><p>
  <i>Is he… flirting? Oh, come on, Gee, not the mixed signals again…</i>
</p><p>“So, what do you need a fake girlfriend for? Wedding? Christmas party? Some pureblood secret society ritual party thing?” He cackled at that.</p><p>“Actually, not too far off. It’s the Way Family Ball, we hold it every year in June,” he explained. We were just outside the castle door. Just about to say goodnight. I stopped again and faced him, taking in the sight of him in the moonlight: skin pale as snow and hair the color of blood. He was beautiful as ever and I was having war flashbacks to every cliché first date where this is the part when the boy kisses the girl goodnight on her front doorstep. </p><p>“You know what I think you should do?” Gerard cocked his head in question.</p><p>“Fuck the police and tell the old man where to stick it. Or blow off the party,” I suggested with a smirk before turning and striding down the hall. I could hear Gee’s giggles behind me.</p><p>“Or, better yet,” i threw over my shoulder, “find some handsome wizard and shock the fuck out of him.”</p><p>I only barely caught Gerard’s stunned expression before I was bolting back to the dungeons heart racing.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p><b>Ashes</b>: A HUNDRED YEARS HAVE PASSED AND- okay not actually but yeah its been a while...<br/><b>Gems</b>: But we’ve brought the gay agenda back in full force, we’ve got it all folks, angst, gay pining, some flufF???<br/><b>Ashes</b>: YES FLUFF YOU'RE WELCOME i mean i’m just here to give the people what they want<br/><b>Gems</b>:I mean I was hyped as fuck when I read it, ashes can testify, so please leave a kudo and a comment cause we love to read them.<br/><b>Ashes</b>: Thank you so much for helping us break 1000 hits! Love you guys and see you next time!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0012"><h2>12. My life’s all Panic and no Disco.</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <b>Ray</b>
</p><p>“Is that an ass?” Frank asked leaning over me like the nosey shit he is.</p><p>I slammed the ancient textbook shut as quick as possible, sending a little plume of dust up into the air. Maybe it just came with the territory of being a literal fucking hobbit, but Iero had the uncanny ability to be everywhere at once. I swear he can apparate.</p><p>“You never fail to bring class to a conversation, Frank.” I sighed, keeping the smile firmly off my face.</p><p>“Hey, I’m not the one reading porn out in the library.” He purposely raised his voice so that the entire fucking building could hear. I gaped up at him in betrayal, the heat rising in my ears. The limey bastard just smirked and shrugged innocently as he swung around onto the seat opposite. I caught the eye of a ginger girl on the next table over, I opened my mouth to try and explain myself, but she just gave me a repulsed grimace before pointedly turning away. <i>Fucking Frank</i>, I seethed as the heat spread to my cheeks. The bastard in question started giggling like mad.</p><p>“For your information, it’s <i>not</i> porn, it’s for <i>class</i>.” I bit back exasperatedly, probably a bit too loud I realised as the librarian shushed me from some over aisle. <i>Where’s the justice?</i> Frank <i>was just screaming from the fucking rooftops!</i> I thought miserably, slumping into my arms. He chuckled under his breath before continuing.</p><p>“Anyway, I thought you’d already had your Defence Against the Dark Arts test last week?” I sat bolt upright; my stomach dropped momentarily. <i>Shit I wasn’t fast enough</i>, it was dangerous having a perceptive friend like Frank around.</p><p>“It’s- It’s for care of magic creatures actually.” I avoided his eye and instead busied myself with my Astrology notes for tomorrow's class. </p><p>“Oh cool,” He threw off nonchalantly. “Soooo, guess what's coming up?” He continued with a newfound enthusiasm, waggling his eyebrows at me furiously. Oh god, this could only mean trouble.</p><p>“I don’t think I want to know honestly.” I finished a cursive quill stroke at the top of a ‘T’.</p><p>“Oh come <i>onnn</i>,” he drawled like a small child, the old oaken table creaked as he practically crawled over it, squashing a trail of books in his wake, just so he could lie right on top of the one I was reading from. “It’s only, like, the most important day of the year.”</p><p>I looked up at him finally and fought a giggle when I saw him staring up at me with intensified eyebrow waggling. I sat back a little and thought genuinely for a moment about what month it was, before I suddenly got what he was on about. It must have shown in my face because he was grinning.</p><p>“Holy shit! It’s October already?”</p><p>“HALLOWEEN BABY!” He shouted, clapping his hands together from his book perch. Mrs. Prince seemed to almost apparate next to us, we nearly both jumped out of our skin. For such a small withered woman she was seriously intimidating, and all of that murderous energy was currently focused in on Frank. “Iero! So help me <i>Merlin</i>, If you’ve damaged any of those books you’ll be leaving this room in a bin bag, do I make myself clear?!” She seethed, Frank shot bolt upright before nodding profusely, satisfied, she slinked away.</p><p>After a moment I burst out laughing, Frank cracked a smile but folded his arms into himself “Jesus! I swear she’s like some omnipresent book demon, If I fucking <i>breathe</i> on a book it’ll summon her.”</p><p>I laughed even harder at that. “I think you were doing a little more than breathing on them, Frankie.” I motioned towards the carnage he’d caused. Books were strewn everywhere, pages crinkled and torn at the spines. My ink pot lay strewn to the side slowly leaking, I noticed too late, right into my Astrology textbook. </p><p>Frank's eyes comically bulged when he caught sight of it “Ah shit! I'm so sorry dude.” He picked up the book but only started to trail more ink everywhere. I leaned over to snatch it off him before he could get it anywhere else.</p><p>“It’s cool, I’ve got it.” I squished my wand around in a circular motion, the ink started to rise up off the table up into a liquid vortex mid-air, mimicking the motions of my wand. I could see Frank ogling at it through tapers in the inky wall.  I slowly, careful to keep concentration, guided it back into the bottle where it finally sloshed back into place. I checked the textbook and frowned at some of the stains it had left behind.</p><p>“Holy shit that was amazing! I’m seriously never going to get over magic, you’re awesome!” Frank babbled, I looked up at him and smiled a little, blushing not out of embarrassment for once. </p><p>I hated it when Frank said I was good at magic, it was total bullshit, sure I’d had to become a lot more competent with the different areas of magic since my... my accident, but I was still leagues behind all the pure blood kids, like Mikey.</p><p>“I kinda fucked it up but-” </p><p>“Bullshit! That was awesome,” His expression grew sincere “Ray, you seriously need to have more faith in yourself, you put in the work and it’s obvious.”</p><p>I was a little taken aback, I genuinely couldn’t remember the last time Frank was remotely serious</p><p>“I- Thanks.” I finished awkwardly, smiling despite myself. Frank gave a contented hum and immediately got back to the topic at hand.</p><p>“Sooo I want to do something big for this year's one, not a snoozefest like last year.” He added with a pointed glare in my direction.</p><p>I held up my hands defensively “Hey! I thought you would’ve liked dungeons and dragons, seeing as you were a muggle and all.”</p><p>Frank rolled his eyes, “You forget that we’re wizards Ray, we don’t need to roll dice to cast spells and shit.”</p><p>I glowered at him but conceded “Whatever, fine maybe something a bit more.. <i>active</i> then D&amp;D is in order,” It suddenly dawned on me: “This'll be the last birthday I’ll have with you,” Frank’s face immediately fell, I tried to keep the frown off my own “S-so we have to go out with a bang!” </p><p>“Why?” He asked simply, voice uncharacteristically small, eyes fixed on his hands that were busy shredding up some scrap paper.</p><p>“Why wouldn’t we make it special? We could-“ But Frank cut me off</p><p>“Don’t play dumb Ray, you know what I’m really asking.” He had looked up at me now, his honey eyes steely with hurt and a little bit of confusion.</p><p>I paused trying to think of something that would satisfy him, “I… I’m leaving the country after school.” I said slowly, it wasn't a <i>complete</i> lie I supposed.</p><p>Frank grunted “But you’re a wizard can’t you, I don’t know, like teleport or something over, just to visit?”</p><p>Now I was the one avoiding eye contact, eyes firmly trained on the oaken marbling of the table. <i>I don’t want to hurt him, but I don’t want to get his hopes up either. God this whole subject just makes me feel like shit</i>, I thought morosely.</p><p>I shook my head and forced on a smile, “I was thinking we could raid the kitchens, you know, cause we’re probably gonna miss the feast right?” I begged him with my eyes to drop it, he looked straight back at me steadily, like he was looking <i>through</i> me for a moment before sighing and leaning back in his chair.</p><p>“Yeah?”</p><p>I felt like human garbage for making Frank gloomy, especially when we’re meant to be talking about his birthday.</p><p>“What was your idea anyway, <i>Birthday Boy</i>?” I teased, he broke into a grin, the tension in the air immediately dissipated.</p><p>“Okay so I like your thinking with the food, OH!” He slammed his hands down on the table as he remembered something, “And Patrick said he knows a guy who can hook us up with some booze. Sooo, Concept, we all get shit faced down in the dark forest!” He waved his hands ahead of him as if to say ‘Tadaah!’.</p><p>My blood went immediately cold, “No!” I shouted a little bit too loudly, some neighbouring Ravenclaws fixed me with a death stare. “No.” I said softer, Frank was obviously taken aback but recovered quickly, expression turning smug.</p><p>“Why? You’re not <i>scared</i>, are you Toro?”</p><p>“No. But well, I mean…” I desperately racked my brain thinking of some believable excuse, “Vic Fuentes said there’s like some vampire cult up in there.” Frank raised an eyebrow, obviously not buying it. I doubled down, shaking my head aggressively, “It’s true! He said they snatch people up in the dead of night, turn them, and they’re never heard from again! It’s some seriously hardcore shit dude.”</p><p>Frank rolled his eyes, “Okay okay fineeee, what-” He cut himself off as another idea dawned on his face, I groaned internally. “What if we went somewhere even better?” His expression turned devilish as he leaned forward, motioning for me to come in closer “What if we went to the Shrieking Shack?”</p><p>I sat back up so fast I bumped our heads together, “The Shrieking Shack!?” I spat out, someone shushed me from an aisle, I leaned in again so I could whisper shout, “Are you mad?”</p><p>“Oh my god,” Frank snorted, laughing into his arm, “I didn’t know you were such a pussy Toro.”</p><p>“I’m not a- “ Frank giggled into his arm, I shoved him, only half joking “Shut up, I’m not a pussy, it's just that it’s one of the most haunted places in all of Britain!” My voice had grown very shrill which had thrown Frank into another fit of hysterics, he’s told me on a number of occasions that I remind him of a 40 year old housewife, which I resent. I looked around to make sure no one can overhear us before adding, “<i>Voldemort</i> was there, like only a couple years ago!”</p><p>Unlike any sane person, this only seemed to egg Frank on, “Exactly! The atmosphere, the history and plus, no one’s gonna come looking for us. It’s perfect.”</p><p>The sound of ancient bells clanging echoed throughout the corridors and into the library, the students around us started sliding books into bags and packing up, I scrabbled to pick up my literal mountain of books while Frank helped.</p><p>“Ughh, I guess maybe-“ I muttered in defeat, I knew at this point that once Frank had his heart set on something there was little hope of deterring him.</p><p>“Sweet! I’ll go ask Patrick about getting us sorted after Potions! Brendon’s gonna be so hyped, maybe even Ryan’ll come along.” I yelped as Frank dropped the book he was passing me right onto my foot, he cast me an apologetic smile before retrieving it.</p><p>As we made our way towards to door, I hesitated before asking, “But does it really have to be, like, <i>Everyone</i> though?” He cast me a sidelong glance.</p><p>“Why? Don’t you like Patrick and the others?” He looked a little hurt. I immediately shook my head.</p><p>“No no he’s great and all, just, why can’t it be us this year?” We started making our way out into the main corridor which had quickly become packed as a rainbow of students of all houses darted around in search of friends and classrooms.</p><p>Frank snorted before giving me a look, “Because, no offense Ray, but that would be pretty tragic, just the two of us alone getting drunk in the dark.”</p><p>I let out a half-hearted laugh. I didn’t really <i>do</i> people, at least not anymore. I could hurt them, hell I <i>had</i> hurt them, I was reminded of that every single time I saw that scar on Gerard’s arm. Anyone who gets close, who <i>touches</i> me, is at risk of it infecting their life, seeping in like an inky tar that you can never scrub away. I didn’t want anyone else to go through what I did, what I do. The fact I’ve even let Frank get this close is disgustingly selfish, one wrong move, one chance encounter and I could ruin his life forever. He’s only 14. He’s been so kind, so blindly accepting, but that would all surely change if he found out, if anyone found out. The way they’d look at me? The things they’d say about me? Merlin, they’d run me out of Hogwarts if I was lucky, or if not they’d hunt me down and have me killed. My vision grew a little shaky as my heart raced a hundred miles a minute, thunderous in my ears. I became aware of every shoulder that brushed me, every bump against me, I flinched at everyone. It felt like every eye was beating down on me, like they could see me, like REALLY see me. Fuck they all probably knew, everyone knew they were just waiting to take me down and tear me apart and-</p><p>“Jesus Ray are you alright?” Frank brought me back down, he was staring up at me, the concern evident on his face. I let a breath I didn’t know I’d been holding, panting a little. His hand twitched at his side, like he was itching to reach out and comfort me, but he knew my quirks about human contact.</p><p>“Oh nah, I’m all good, just tired you know? What were we talking about?” He clearly wasn’t buying it, but thankfully continued on.</p><p>“My birthday, and why the hell you want it to be a two-man pity party.”</p><p>“I don’t-” Frank looked up at me with mock puppy dog eyes.</p><p>“Oh pwease Ray, would you do it for wittle old me?” He whined in a baby voice. I snorted.</p><p>“Fuck okay fine, we can maybe bring a couple people.” We got split apart by the stampede of students at a fork in the corridor, “We’ll talk about it at lunch.” I shouted above the throng of students.</p><p>Frank stopped amongst the crowd, royally pissing off the guy behind him. He gave me one of those critical looks, like he was trying to see right into my head and figure out what was going on behind the scenes. “Dude if it’s going to make you feel uncomfortable, we don't have to-”</p><p>I held up my hands to cut him off, cringing against the crowd “No it’s your birthday, I’ll be good, trust me.” </p><p>But as I watched him retreat back into the swath of students with a wave of his hand. I knew that was a lie. My heart was still racing after the episode I’d had in the hall. I quickly and quietly slipped into the closest bathroom, blasting the taps ice cold before throwing it up onto my face. I hung over the sink and tried to breathe for a second until my heart stopped threatening to bust out of my chest. <i>Take it easy, Toro</i>. I breathed out as I looked up at my reflection. I looked shit even by my standards. I was tired, that much was obvious from the purple smears under my eyes.</p><p>As I rubbed at them there was a cough from behind me. I jumped out of my skin, whipping around to see Mikey-Fucking-Way leaning nonchalantly against the block of stalls. I bit my lip as I looked at him, just having him focusing all his attention on me made my heart palpitate for a number of reasons. I panicked when I realised it was just the two of us.</p><p>“Jesus Christ Mikey, what is this, the Blaire Witch Project?”</p><p>He just stared back at me blankly, “The what?”</p><p>“Never mind” I muttered reaching for my book bag. I quickly shovelled up as much of my things as I could carry before beelining for the door. I could not handle being alone in a room with him, just as I reached the door he called out to me.</p><p>“What’s wrong with you?”</p><p>I froze in my tracks. “What?” I stammered; I didn’t have the stomach to turn around.</p><p>He sauntered closer to me, slow and languid like a cat, “There’s something all wrong with,” he motioned up and down at me. “<i>This</i>.”</p><p>I looked down at the cracks in the bathroom tiles. I should really leave. “Sorry I’m not following.”</p><p>He wrinkled his nose up at me. “You forget I knew you before, whatever happened, happened” he flourished his hands as he talked looking at me over his glasses. “You were never like <i>this</i>, all rigid, shaky and afraid. Guilty almost. Like you’re hiding something.”</p><p>The blood was roaring in my ears as my heart ran a mile a minute.</p><p>“Fuck, just lay off Mikey,” I fumbled with my bag strap “I’m just freaked over my NEWTS that’s all.” I didn’t meet his eye.</p><p>He scoffed, “What? The ones that are like a year away? You seriously expect me to buy that crock of shit?”</p><p>“Yes!” I cringed at how my voice cracked.</p><p>“Toro, stop embarrassing yourself, Frankly you’re an awful liar.” Mikey pushed off the sink, “You’re not scared about some bullshit exams. But about what exactly I’m not too sure.” He slunk closer to me; I couldn’t keep my eyes off how his hips swayed when he did so. I shook my head, trying to keep my head straight for five seconds. I shrunk back when I realised he was blocking the door.</p><p>“But whatever it is, I think it’s going to hurt people, <i>good</i> people, just like my brother.” His voice hardened on that last part. I felt the colour leave my face.</p><p>“What did he-“</p><p>“Shut up!” I jumped as he snapped, cutting me off. His model-like angular features were twisted in frustration. “God didn’t you ever learn to speak when spoken too? Classic mudblood.” I fucking hated when Mikey was like this, so full of baseless prejudiced rage.</p><p>“Now I don’t know you’re even smart enough to conjure up something truly dangerous on your own, or if someone else is pulling the strings. Don’t think I haven’t noticed your little midnight excursions outside the castle.” I flatlined, <i>fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, FUCK.</i></p><p>He squinted at me, as if examining me for some kind of a dead give-away. I gulped as I pulled down hard on my shirt sleeves.</p><p>“No, you <i>definitely</i> don’t have brains to pull it off alone. Is it Iero? Is he planning something? A power play?”</p><p>My face contorted in confusion, <i>okay now I’m completely lost.</i></p><p>“Or is he even smart enough for that?” He said more to himself then me, like he’d completely forgotten I was there for a moment.</p><p>He cast his hand aside. “Whatever, it doesn’t matter, what <i>matters</i> is,” He took a couple more steps towards me till he was only a nose length away. I stumbled back but was trapped in by the cool bathroom wall. My face burned bright red as I was forced to look into his eyes. I had always loved his eyes. Warm hazel like a summer solstice that split off into a rich chocolatey brown in one. It was, perhaps, the only imperfect thing about that perfect boy. Fuck I sounded cheesy I laughed internally.</p><p>“I’m watching you, you’ve made a powerful enemy Toro,” My heart raced as I felt his breath glide over my neck, as I watched his tongue push slightly at his lip, they were only an inch or two from mine. God I could just- “One who’s strong and holds a grudge like a motherfucker.” Mikey shocked me back into the reality of the situation. “So Watch. Your. Back.” He spat, before he shoved his arm into my chest, pinning me up against the wall.</p><p>Every nerve in my body screamed at his touch, <i>Leave, leave, get out, GET OUT</i>. My breath caught in my throat as I pushed back against him, sending him stumbling back. I booked it for the door, “What the fuck is wrong with you?” I shouted back at him, before slamming the door shut behind me, though not before I caught his slack jawed expression.</p><p>It probably looked insanely incriminating but I was beyond caring at this point. I could still feel the ghost of where Mikey’s arms had been moments before. My mind was whirling between flustered, panicked, and full-blown freak out with each pounding step I took down the deserted corridor. He touched me, he TOUCHED me, I could have hurt him. I shuddered.</p><p>I pushed desperately into a broom supply closet and slammed it tight. I crawled into the nearest corner at record speed, pressing myself clumsily against the cool stone in some desperate attempt to calm down. The small room only doubled the volume of my shallow breaths till they were deafening. He knew. Or at least he was going to find out. And if he knew, <i>everyone</i> would, Frank, Gerard, my parents. <i>Holy shit</i>!</p><p>For a greedy moment I about Mikey so close to me. Why god did I have to fall for the one who wants nothing more then to see me run out of this school? I hugged my knees. I got the sinking feeling that my life was doomed to go off track one way or another this year, like I was on the precipice between happiness and disaster. It seemed that Mikey was determined to drag me kicking and screaming into the later. <i>Fuck as if I didnt have enough to put up with</i>, I thought ruefully.</p><p>I just had to be careful.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p><b>Gems</b>: Ray is high key my fav character ngl<br/><b>Ashes</b>: Ray is best boy Mikey is losing it and everyone is still very gay<br/><b>Gems</b>: Pretty much a summary of the entire fic haha<br/><b>Ashes</b>: What if we just left it at that and didn't continue or answer any of the people's burning questions mwhahahaha….<br/><b>Gems</b>:Yes I like the sound of that mwhaha, leave a kudo and a comment &lt;3<br/><b>Ashes</b>: Or you wont get another chapter &gt;:) LOVE YOU GUYS<br/><b>Gems</b>: Oh shitttt</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0013"><h2>13. Revelations</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <b>Patrick</b>
</p><p>Raymond Toro wasn’t exactly my… friend. But Frank was and he was frank’s friend, meaning a certain level of comradery was expected. Thus, I approached the bush-headed introvert with caution and an air of faux-normalcy. </p><p>Nothing felt normal about this.</p><p>“Ahem, Raymond,” the 7th year looked up at the sound of my voice (I briefly relished feeling taller than him as he was seated, pouring over his book) with fearful eyes. “I was recently made aware of a birthday party for my roommate, our mutual friend, Frank Anthony Iero, jr. and I would like to formally offer my services in organizing the affair. He mentioned you were involved and I assume we’ll all be celebrating together?” </p><p>Ray was now gawking at me in shock rather than fear and I momentarily wished I could speak without sounding like a textbook. </p><p>But then Ray continued gawking rather than responding to me and, really, my patience could only last so long. </p><p>“A response would be appreciated, sometime this year, Toro.” The flustered boy flapped his hands and stammered something like an affirmation. I took it as a cue to sit down across from him.</p><p>“Well, as my skills in organization are unparalleled, I would love to help you iron out the details. So, where will the party be held?”</p><p>“Th-the, um, the Shrieking Shack.”</p><p>“The- what?” I quickly schooled my expression neutral, ignoring the slight creeping fear I felt at the mention of Britain's most haunted building. “How like Frank… Well then, we’ll see about refreshments, certainly some sweets from Honeydukes and perhaps someone can acquire alcohol, firewhiskey, maybe? I suppose that means I’ll have to deal with Wentz now… <i>Anyway</i>, moving on, oh- may i borrow this?” I snatched his spare quill and a loose sheet of parchment from in front of him. “Butterbeer is a must, and perhaps some muggle snacks as well. I know frank’s favorites, do you have any preferences?”</p><p>Ray stared at me, gobsmacked. And maybe, there was just a little bit of a smile on his face.</p><p>
  <b>Mikey</b>
</p><p>In hindsight, I should have known that Pete Wentz was going to be a horrible partner in crime. Honestly, how could he be of any use to me in this critical hunt for <i>answers</i> and <i>justice</i> if he couldn’t show up on time to our reconnaissance meetings? I sat, irritably casting <i>tempus</i>, and noting that Wentz was now a whole <i>two minutes late</i>.</p><p>“Unacceptable, i mean honestly… stupid Wentz with his stupid lack of responsibility and his stupid forgetfulness, and his stupidly attractive face-” <i>wait what</i>. Freezing, mid pace, I briefly considered obliviating myself.</p><p>
  <i>No, no, Michael Way, there is nothing attractive about Pete Wentz. You’re stressed and under rested. That’s all. Foggy minded…</i>
</p><p>The momentary betrayal of my thoughts filled me with an inexplicable terror, so I pushed past it and resumed pacing, likely wearing tread marks into the half dead grass by the lake. </p><p>A whole two more minutes passed before i saw Pete wandering towards me with a charmin- <i>stupid</i> grin on his face. </p><p>“And where the fuck have you been, Wentz?! You’re now exactly five minutes late, we said we would meet here at 2:00, not 2:05, i’m not sure if you know what a clock is, but there’s a massive one in our school and when it goes <i>ding-dong</i> twice, that means be at the lake with Mikey!” But Pete was undisturbed by my ranting. In fact, he didn’t seem to hear a word, because instead of apologizing for his insolence, he was grabbing me by the shoulders with a look of wild joy in his brown eyes.</p><p>“You will not believe the information I have for you,” he said in a tone entirely too loud given his proximity to my face.</p><p>“Well, unless it benefits me catching Toro, i don't care-”</p><p>“It does! Ray and Patty are planning a birthday party for Frank on halloween. At the shrieking shack.” I paused and took in his words. </p><p>“And how did you come by this information?” Pete's cheeks flamed.</p><p>“Oh, y’know, i was just in the library, studying-”</p><p>“Stalking Patrick.”</p><p>“-and i overheard my sweet Pattycakes talking to Ray about planning a party and, i mean, Patty and parties those are basically my two favorite things,” he said with a happy little shrug.</p><p>“Hm… this could provide valuable information… I’m certain Iero must be privy to whatever psychotic plots Toro has, given how close they are…” A brief pang of anger and sadness hit me as I remembered how that closeness used to be with Gerard. I shook it off.</p><p>“Alright, game plan, we follow them, stake out the shack, all night, and listen in to their conversations. I bet it’s not even a real birthday party, it’s probably some demonic cult ritual, we record everything we hear and-”</p><p>“Or we just go to the party.”</p><p>“As much as I lack respect for Iero, I still possess enough decorum to not show up at a party I haven't been invited to.”</p><p>“But stalking is acceptable?”</p><p>“It’s not stalking, it’s-”</p><p>“Whatever, what i mean is, you go as a plus one.” Now, I knew Pete was crazy.</p><p>“Plus one to who, exactly?” the gryffindor’s face split in a shit eating grin.</p><p>“The one person Frank wants there but is entirely too chicken to invite.”</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Ray</b>
</p><p>If someone had told me three years ago that i would be helping plan a birthday party for that boy i saved on the changing stairs, with another boy who was decidedly “my friend, by proxy”, i would have hexed them. Yet, there I sat in the candlelit Great Hall, talking over plans for getting into the Shrieking Shack on Halloween night with Patrick Stump. </p><p>The young Slytherin had an impressive list of plans on how to magically decorate the shack and Frank's favorite muggle sweets.</p><p>“Now, i have a package arriving from home tomorrow with all the muggle necessities, two days early as scheduled, and these charms will suffice for decorating, they’re subtle since frank will enjoy the decrepit horror of the shack on its own-”</p><p>“About that…” I piped up and Patrick froze, mid-word.</p><p>“Yes?”</p><p>“How exactly are we to… get to the shack? It’s all the way in Hogsmeade…”</p><p>“Raymond, you’ve been at the school longer than me, are you truly unaware of the tunnel under the Whomping Willow that leads directly into the Shack?” I felt my cheeks heat in embarrassment.</p><p>“No, but that still involves <i>crawling under the Whomping Willow</i>,” I muttered.</p><p>“There’s this lovely little immobilizing charm, don’t know if you’ve heard of it.” I rolled my eyes at his sass, mildly pissed off at feeling so foolish. </p><p>“Fine, then,” I huffed, trying to tamp down the surmounting anger. Patrick chuckled at me and my rage flared again. </p><p>
  <i>Calm down, Jesus, what’s wrong with me? </i>
</p><p>I kept on taking deep breaths as Patrick outlined the rest of the plans, which involved extending invitations to Brendon, Ryan, Josh, and Tyler. </p><p>“Frank might also try to invite Gerard,” Patrick said, tentatively. Like a rope snapping, I could feel the anger white-hot coursing through me. Giving a tense nod, I shot up from my seat and, with the bullshit excuse of a sick stomach, fled to my dormitory.</p><p>It wasn’t until I was passing the window in the hall that my inexplicable rage made sense.</p><p>The rising moon outside was very nearly full.</p><p>***</p><p>I fiddled with my shirt sleeve, meticulously un-buttoning and refastening it again. <i>How am I supposed to tell Frank that I couldn’t come to his birthday? My</i> last <i>birthday with him</i>. I chewed at my bottom lip, fighting off the nausea that was part from nerves and from part my body submitting to the rising moon. It was like some kind of sick foreshadowing of what’s in store for me come later that week. </p><p>I was cooped up in a little armour out-clove near the potions room, waiting to catch Frank on his way out. I jumped as I heard the distant thundering of footsteps a few corridors over. The echo down here didn’t mesh well with my uncomfortably heightened senses that came with this time in the lunar cycle. It made a book dropping sound like a fucking freight train. No wonder I always had a migraine the week before the moon. </p><p>
  <i>Fuck, the moon. </i>
</p><p>My heart started thumping hard against my ribs, that familiar terror settled into my bones and threatened to make me sick. I swallowed hard. I tried not to think about that as much as possible, otherwise I’d have a full on meltdown. I took a shaky breath. <i>Focus, back to Frank.</i> </p><p><i>I suppose I could always just not show up</i>, I thought. <i>No, he deserves better than that, plus he’d probably never speak to me again</i>. I sighed, returning back to my buttons. No excuse seemed good enough, let alone believable.</p><p>There was a deafening crash of a grandfather clock somewhere around the corner that made me grimace, instinctively smashing my hands up against my ears to try and drown out some of the noise.</p><p>Students started pouring out of the potions lab, some casting me confused sidelong glances as they passed. I untangled my hands from my hair and brought them close to my chest, where I felt my heart start to race despite myself. It always seems to do that now, and it drives me mad. </p><p>It wasn't so much the incessant beat but the fear that inspires it. That near constant anxiety that had taken over every facet of my life and I fucking hated it. That was the side effect of- of my condition that no one ever talked about. The all consuming paranoia. Paranoia that someone’s going to find out, paranoia that all your friends could leave you at a moment's notice, paranoia that you could tear someone apart, or worse, make them sick just like you.</p><p>I never used to be a scared person, sure Jason Vorhees used to make me scared enough to keep the lights on, but now? That unshakable dread was all I could think about. It’s taken over my entire fucking life.</p><p>Sometimes I just sit in my room and cry because I can’t escape the anxiety, the fears. And the worst part is that I’m entirely alone, I can’t share it with anyone.</p><p>“Ray? What the hell are you doing out here?” Frank looked up at me with a look of surprised bemusement, then cracked a smile “Just couldn’t wait to see my handsome mug, aye?” </p><p>I tried to laugh but faltered. “It‘s, um, about your birthday..” <i>fuck why didn’t I come up with a plan?</i></p><p>Frank crammed into the cramped little space to avoid getting trampled by the sea of students. “Oooo have we made headway on the booze situation? Apparently there’s been an ‘altercation’ with Wentz, which I’m just taking as trouble in paradise but you know.” Frank rambled with a shit eating grin. I felt my hands get sweaty</p><p>Shaking my head, I looked down at the flagship pavers of the floor. “Um, it’s more like- that- you see-“ I stammered, grabbing hard at my elbows in frustration as I did. Fuck <i>why can’t I be just fucking normal, that I wouldn’t have to abandon my friend on his fucking birthday or lie to his face?!</i> I felt my nails dig in so hard to my skin that it stung.</p><p>“Hey, hey, what’s going on?” Frank dropped the sarcastic demeanour in an instant and went to reach his hand out but stopped halfway. It didn’t stop me from flinching back, suddenly aware of how cramped it was in here. He looked up at me wide eyed and confused. </p><p>“I- fuck- I can’t come to your party- I’m really sorry, my-my aunt is sick? Shit- I-I’ve gotta go home,” I stammered a Mach speed. With that I barged past him not waiting for a response. I could hear his distinct footfall amongst the crowd behind me but easily outran him until I was out of the dungeons and back to the hufflepuff dorms. I felt the glances of a group of confused fifth years gathered around a game of exploding snap as I ran up to my room and slammed the door behind me, making it rattle in place. </p><p>“FUCK!” I yelled into the empty room. There it was again, that intrusive anger that felt wholly alien. Like a virus seeping into my bones that made my hands ball into fists so hard that they shook. I never, and I mean NEVER, used to get angry. I’d get annoyed, sure, but I could always brush it off with a laugh or a joke. Not anymore. It‘s like I didn’t have any control of myself. And that’s what I hated the most about all this, that my emotions weren’t even my own anymore. They’re so strong and all consuming that it honestly terrifies me.</p><p>I wasn’t angry at Frank, but at everything. At the <i>animal</i> that bit me, at the universe for letting it happen, at myself for being so irrevocably STUPID that night that I just chased after Mikey into those woods without so much as a second thought.  </p><p>If I hadn't been so naive and in love I would be human still instead of- instead of this <i>fucking monster</i> waiting to lash out and hurt someone. </p><p>“Fuck!” I spat as it all got too much and I plowed my fist into my headpost, not flinching as it splintered.</p><p>It was at that point that I fell down onto my bed and let the shallow sobs take me. </p><p>
  <b>Pete</b>
</p><p>That had been nothing short of painful to overhear. For so many reasons…</p><p>Firstly, Toro was a horrific liar. Listening to him try and make an excuse had made me want to pull my own hair out.</p><p>Secondly, he was clearly distraught. I almost felt bad… Whatever the hell was going on with him was majorly fucking him up. With that knowledge, I felt more compelled to report back to mikey. Maybe Toro would get in trouble for whatever shit we discovered, but in the end, bringing his secret to light might get him help. That’s what i told myself as i set off toward the Room of Requirement. </p><p>“Finally! You’re two minutes late!” Mikey was already there, perched on a couch, and pouring over a journal full of notes, I assumed, related to Ray. “So, find anything else?” </p><p>“Y’know, maybe you could do some of the spying for once,” I muttered. Mikey’s face flushed a bit as I flopped onto the couch next to him.</p><p>
  <i>Are we too close? His leg’s against mine… Ah, whatever.</i>
</p><p>“I-I can’t, obviously. Frank is suspicious enough around me and I live in a dormitory next to his. Regardless, what do you have?” I sighed and stretched my arms. Quidditch was really killing me…</p><p>“Toro cancelled on frank. Totally out of the blue, clearly lying about his aunt being sick, acting super cagey. Frank couldn’t even stop him when he bolted like a bat outta hell,” i reported, sitting up and readjusting. <i>Oh, screw personal space</i>, I thought and flopped sideways so my torso covered Mikey's lap and my legs were stretched over the couch. </p><p>Mikey looked ready to explode. But not from anger…</p><p>“You good, man?” </p><p>“I would be <i>better</i> if you weren’t crushing me!” the slytherin boy squeaked. </p><p>“Hey, I ain't that heavy! Besides, I'm beat from quidditch, lemme stretch out for Merlin’s sake…” Mikey kept his eyes trained on the wall ahead, his cheeks on fire. I never thought i’d say it, but Mikey Fuckin’ Way looked kind of… cute. “W-well if you wanted, a whole other couch would appear, i mean, this is the Room of Requirement, after all, you idiot…” This would be too easy…</p><p>“Maybe I don't want that, maybe I prefer your lap,” I said with a grin, closing my eyes, and reclining over his boney legs. </p><p>Mikey didn’t reply and simply reopened his journal. </p><p>A few minutes passed in silence as I rested my tired limbs and mikey studied. Random books and things would appear on the table in front of us as Mikey needed them. His lap was warm despite his knobby knees and jutting hip bones, and the rhythm of his breathing paired with the soft noises of rustling parchment almost lulled me to sleep when-</p><p>“OH MY GOD! How did I not see it before? How could i have missed this, how could i be such a fool?! Pete, this is it, it all fits!” I jolted up, dazed and scrambling to look at Mikey's notes.</p><p>“See here, Ray is always missing classes in a twenty-eight day pattern, his mood declines, he looks tired and pale, that's what we notice all since the term started? Right, well now see here, it’s not just any twenty-eight day pattern. There’s a reason Ray had to cancel on Frank so suddenly: Halloween is the night of the full moon.”</p><p>“So that means-”</p><p>“HE BELONGS TO A DEMONIC CULT WHICH CAN ONLY PERFORM THEIR RITUALS BY THE LIGHT OF A FULL MOON! There’s loads of info on this, how the full moon can be used for all kinds of dark ritual magic, pertaining to demonic summoning and…”</p><p>I tuned out as Mikey continued because, in a manner of minutes, I had gone from thinking Mikey was a genius to wanting to slap him. </p><p><i>And they say I'm an idiot,</i> I thought, rolling my eyes. I’d just wait until he figured it out. But honestly, how thick could you get?</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p><b>Ashes</b>: Y’know at this rate we might have the halloween chapter out ON FUCKING HALLOWEEN…..<br/><b>Gems</b>: Ahahaha, fucking true so sorry about the delay &gt;-&lt;<br/><b>Ashes</b>: We have jobs… and life things… and y'know…. Important obligations… <br/><b>Gems</b>: Like binge watching the umbrella academy for the 14th time hahaha<br/><b>Ashes</b>: SHHHHHH I DID NO SUCH THING<br/><b>Gems</b>: So surprise! Rays got some shit going on<br/><b>Ashes</b>:Are you smarter than a mikey way  <br/><b>Gems</b>: Honestly it isnt fucking hard at this point he’s a total himbo haha, did anyone guess it? <br/><b>Ashes</b>: LEAVE US COMMENTS AND KUDOS OR ELSE <br/><b>Gems</b>: Fr we really love them &lt;3, stay safe everyone, we’ll try to have the next chapter out early to make up for the big wait</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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